So that Kat doesn't get her tubes tied

I know I complain a ton about pregnancy. I do it for the humor factor. Don't get me wrong pregnancy is a huge pain in my ass (and back and legs and belly and feet and....) but in reality there are so many rewarding things about pregnancy and the end result. So Kat I thought I would take a few minutes to tell you all the things that are so amazing they will actually make me forget every bad thing about this pregnancy.

  1. Feeling the baby kick around inside of me
  2. Finding out I'm having another amazing little boy
  3. Nursing. The first time you nurse and your child looks into your eyes it is amazing
  4. The first smile, even if it is a fart causing it
  5. The first time they shiver (babies don't shiver when they are little so its really cute when they get big and figure it out)
  6. The first time your son says low you too mommy (love you too)
  7. The first time your son spends the night away and then comes home and says I missed you
  8. The first time they wake you up in the morning and give you a kiss with out ever asking them too. My son gave me about 4 kisses one morning in bed then turned over and kissed Rob a bunch and just laid back down with us.
  9. The first time your son says momma hole you (momma hold me)
  10. The fist time you see your child have cake
  11. Having someone who considers a surprise getting a spoon full of cream cheese from the store rather then thinking a surprise was a toy or something of monetary value
  12. The first time you are hormonal and crying and your kid comes up and says momma you sad and kisses you
  13. The first time your baby learns to laugh
  14. The first time your child learns to make you laugh
  15. The first time your son says momma more tisses (more kisses) and makes you kiss them again and again and again
  16. The first hugs
  17. The first steps
  18. The first game of peek a boo
  19. The first sneeze
  20. The first time your baby gets hiccups outside of the womb and can't stop is so cute. We have hours of footage of Brandon doing nothing but hiccuping
So you see Kat. It isn't all bad. Being a mom for me, might be the very best thing that ever happened to me. And truth be told I would be pregnant for five years just to experience one amazing day with my son.

Thank you Brandon

My son is currently picking boogers out of his nose. He was simply flicking them at me. However now, he's trying to shove his boogers in my nose. He thinks this is hilarious. I do not!

Brand new get yours now....Real time alarm clock

Worried about waking up on time? Worried you might miss something during the night? Have I got the solution for you! Presenting the brand new CONTAINED BABY ALARM CLOCK! Alarm comes fully loaded with all the features. Alarm comes to you at no extra charge. For the low low price of one broken condom fumbling night in the dark amazing passion filled night with your husband you can have your own contained baby alarm clock. This clock does not come with snooze features and can not be turned off. Imagine your very own worlds most consistent alarm clock. All of your friends will want one! Alarm will sound every hour on the hour. And will guarantee to wake you up at about 4am! Clock can not be programmed it will run on a specifically designed setting for your needs. Alarm will get angry if you lay on your right side or your back or if you get too comfortable. Alarm can not be silenced no matter what you try. Alarm can be delayed sometimes by getting up and shoveling food into your mouth. Keep in mind no matter how much you may have to pee, emptying your bladder will only give contained baby alarm more room to wiggle and wake you up. Alarm version 1.0 will be great training for free upgrade to come later.

In about 7 months your alarm clock will begin waking you with real live kicking features. Contained baby alarm prefers to wake up no later then 3:30am. Alarm will begin sounding as soon as you fall into a deep comfortable sleep. Attempting to silence alarm will only make it wiggle more.

In 9 short months your alarm will automatically upgrade to REAL LIFE BABY ALARM VERSION 2.0. New upgraded alarm will come complete with crying hourly wake up symbols. This version will come with a new and improved snooze button. To activate snooze button simply attach baby to nearest breast and wala snooze away.

Baby alarm is none refundable and non returnable. Some people may be lucky enough to receive two alarms for the price of one. Offer good as long as your ovaries work and you can bump uglies in the dark. Alarm comes shipped in reusable packaging. Shipping fees include lost youthfulness of once taught belly, and stretch marks. No refunds or returns on stretch marks. Please allow approximately nine months for arrival of upgraded version 2.0 alarm. Some vomiting and nauseousness may occur with alarm clock. All sales are final. This alarm is available only for women.

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