3.21.2008

Little girls are made of sugar, spice and rotting sewage

So I'm baby sitting a little girl. I believe she is about five. She just announced she had to go to the bathroom. A little while later Brandon has to go too. He goes in my bathroom and since he had to pooh I knew I needed to grab some baby wipes. I walk into Codis room right next to the bathroom and puked in my mouth. Thats right. The little girl had pooped so bad I threw up in my mouth IN MY MOUTH!!!! Then I walked out in the hall and it had traveled all the way to my kitchen. I ran in to spray the bathroom and puked again. IT WAS THAT BAD!

So I tell Rob. OMG girl just pooped worse then any of yours. He was like "for reals?" I was like "worse then yours and my dads combined. In fact it smells like rotting sewage mixed with rotting fish mixed with puke mixed with the dump combined with asshole". He was like, "wow, I'm impressed actually." I was like "yeah babe, if she was a guy, she would be sooooo much cooler then you!"

Because, you know, men judge how cool they are by how awful their shit smells, and how long their turds are.

6 comments:

Cristina Mathers said...

oh my gosh were you watching ellie?

just kidding, but there is a reason why she rarely eats corn and raisins.

you are taking care of 3 kids? you are a nut!!!

Jayla'sMommy said...

Ewwww, I wonder what her mom fed her... Because that would be somehting I would NEVER feed Jayla then...

Rachel said...

Oh my goodness. Well I guess she has been eating something that is not doing her any good. I know that feeling-ugh puke in the mouth.

Amanda said...

Oh my gosh, I am so nauseated. Thanks.

Dyan said...

WoW.... note to self..... women are SO much cooler than men, since we dont base our "coolness factor" upon poop.... Sorry you endured that ~

Steph said...

Oh goodness!!!! That about made me puke in my mouth. Thank God I was done with my sandwich before I read this!

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