MISGUIDED'S GIVE AWAY BLOG

RESULTS SHOW

2010-05-10T10:01:00.001-07:00

There was 39 total entries by 18 different people.

Only three of you showed me your purses. You should be ashamed at yourself for all of the entries you missed. Here are the three purses I got to see.

http://ohsillyme.com/2010/05/a-giveaway-somewhere-else/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/38952483@N00/4380707446/

http://mommasjunebugs.blogspot.com/2010/05/designer-bag.html

Shannon gets in trouble

2010-05-10T09:36:00.000-07:00

2010-05-10T09:33:00.000-07:00

Recently I was contacted by a company called CSN Stores asking if I would like to do a review or give away. I browsed around there store and I was dumbfounded by all of the things they had. Bar furniture, kids things, kitchen stuff, purses ugggg the list went on. I had to close it when I got to the kid section because I started getting caught up in things like this (I don't even like bunk beds), and this (TRIPLE BUNK BEDS WHO KNEW!!!) I got out of there and some how stumbled into housewares which somehow led me to the recycling bin area where I saw this..Just what I've always wanted a trash/recycle bin for my kitchen. I headed over to the hand bag area and that is when I found this ridiculously cute diaper clutch. Right about then I knew I had to stop browsing because I DON'T USE DIAPERS MY KIDS ARE POTTY TRAINED! I had all but made up my mind that I was taking that $60.00 and running. But alas, I like you my dear readers so I am going to give it to you instead. (Round of applause please)

Here is the game. In my last post I discussed my issue with not having my purse/wallet/ID case when I went somewhere. My mom commented that perhaps I needed a smaller purse. So, I would first like to show you why that won't work either.

This is my every day purse. It is my beloved Lucky purse that I just had to have. Everyone told me it was too big.

Everyone did not know how much stuff I NEEDED to carry with me. Here we have the contents of my purse!

My wallet.

My bag of necessities (epi pen, xannax, motrin, oragel, etc)

My bag of other necessities (tooth brush, tooth paste, gum, and fancy smelling lotion) (side note you should always have fancy smelling lotion in your bag you never know who you might need to woooo with your delicious apple smell)

My notebook, journal, and pens.

My medical stuff. the boys medical records, my records (med dosage, dr visits etc) and all of our insurance cards and doctors information.

and of course my keys

And my variety of purses IN EVERY SIZE.

So you can clearly see that having a smaller bag is not an issue, I have EVERY SIZE OF BAG.

Here is what happens when I try and carry a smaller bag

The girl stuff gets all pushy with the kids essentials bag, my notebook gets drown, my wallet cries because the pen holder is pinching it and THIS DOESN'T WORK.

I could lose the girl essentials (begrudgingly)

And things fit just fine.

Here though is the actual real problem. The root of it all. NO MATTER WHAT I hate carrying any purse unless it is totally necessary. What I've learned is that I prefer to simply have my phone and ID case. I stick those in my pocket and away I go.

But Shannon what if you don't have pockets (gasp)?

Never fear my lovely friends I always have a pocket. For those of you with kids in diapers you know that they have a terrible habit of shoving things in their diaper and calling it a "pocket." Well folks meet my "pocket."

Yup. There you have it. My pocket. I discovered this while I was at the gym. I needed somewhere to put my phone/iPod so I stuck it in my sports bra while running. I liked that idea so I tried it out a few times while shopping around. I liked that even more so I figured, "hey why not stick your ID case in there and be gone."

Best idea ever. So yes if you run into me now there is about a 90% chance you will see either my phone, or ID case (or both) crammed in my bra.

So it's settled. Purse, no purse, wallet, whatever I will still end up with my goodies stuffed in my bra. Like I said before the real issue is remembering to grab my purse with my wallet from my house and put it in my car. Or remembering that my ID case was in some jeans pockets. The purse has nothing to do with me remembering to put the necessities in my actual car.

But Shannon didn't you say there was a give away?

I did! I did!

Here are the rules. Following them will win you a $60.00 gift card. The better you follow them the more entries you get. I will put all of your entries into a bag and with photo evidence I will pick a winner. Here is how you can enter.

1 entry - leave a comment here

2 extra entries - link to this post on your blog (make sure I know you linked it)

3 extra entries - show me what is inside of your purse and then come back here and comment so I know to go look

And if you want 4 extra entries you can link this post onto your Facebook and/or Twitter account.

So remember the person with the most entries is most likely to win. And trust me folks, you want this $60.00 gift card because there is some really good shit on that Website.

(deadline to enter May 7th, you have one week)

don't forget I've moved

2010-01-09T11:43:00.001-08:00

http://www.misguidedmommy.com/

HEY HEY WHERE DID YOU GO

2009-09-09T13:02:00.000-07:00

HI Y'ALL JUST A REMINDER I HAVE MOVED MAKE SURE YOU UPDATE YOUR FEED READERS WITH THE FOLLOWING LINK
www.misguidedmommy.com/feed

www.misguidedmommy.com come see me today! It's kind of like my old blog only with saggier boobs and more poop posts!

Remember I moved

2009-03-18T22:30:00.000-07:00

Don't forget to come see my new blog here.
www.misguidedmommy.com

I have another give away this week.

A great post

2009-02-26T12:46:00.000-08:00

don't forget to stop by and see my new blog, i just put up a great post come by and read it
http://www.misguidedmommy.com/

I work again

2009-02-17T20:14:00.001-08:00

My new website is working now for Internet Explorer 7, the comments and everything should work great!
www.misguidedmommy.com

DON'T FORGET I MOVED

2009-02-13T16:37:00.001-08:00

I MOVED AND I ALSO ANNOUNCED THE WINNER OF THE PRINTER
www.misguidedmommy.com

Don't forget

2009-02-11T09:02:00.000-08:00

Don't forget I've moved. You can find my new blog and my giveaway here. Also to update your feeds make sure you add
http://www.misguidedmommy.com/feed
to your readers.

Hurry up, only two days left to enter to win.

I CAN HAS RSS FEED

2009-02-10T10:08:00.000-08:00

TO ADD MY NEW BLOG TO YOUR FEED READER PLEASE USE THIS ADDRESS UNDER SUBSCRIBE
http://www.misguidedmommy.com/feed

THAT IS RIGHT I NOW HAVE A FULLY FUNCTIONING BLOG WITH FEED WOOHOO!

DON'T FORGET, GIVE AWAY AND A NEW BLOG

2009-02-10T09:29:00.000-08:00

I JUST WANT TO REMIND YOU THAT OVER ON MY BRAND NEW BLOG I AM GIVING AWAY A BRAND NEW HP PHOTOSMART ALL IN ONE PRINTER. NEVER OPENED IN THE BOX!!!

http://www.misguidedmommy.com/

PLEASE NOTE, THE RSS FEED IS NOT WORKING ON THE NEW BLOG WE ARE RUSHING TO FIX IT, SO I WILL CONTINUE TO POST REMINDERS HERE.

SO STOP BY AND ENTER TO WIN A NEW PRINTER! TELL YOUR FRIENDS.

DON'T FORGET TO UPDATE

2009-02-09T14:43:00.001-08:00

REMEMBER I HAVE MOVED. I CAN NOW BE FOUND AT
http://www.misguidedmommy.com/

MAKE SURE YOU STOP BY BECAUSE I AM DOING ONE INCREDIBLE GIVEAWAY IN HONOR OF MY NEW BLOG!

I HAVE MOVED + A BIG GIVE AWAY

2009-02-09T09:56:00.001-08:00

It's finally here. My shiny new blog. Please update your blog rolls and links. The RSS feed is not up yet so readers won't work. However I will continue posting on this blog with a link so your feed reader will update until the RSS works. So go, check out my new bloggy home!

Make sure you check it out. In honor of my new blog I'm hosting my first giveaway ever. It's a really good give away too!

http://www.misguidedmommy.com/

MAYDAY

2009-02-05T11:19:00.000-08:00

Mayday Mayday BROWNIE DOWN

I REPEAT WE HAVE A BROWNIE DOWN

THIS IS NOT A TEST THIS IS AN ACTUAL EMERGENCY WE ARE MISSING A BROWNIE

*Kkshhk* Whats that, you have a 20 on the brownie?

THE BROWNIE HAS BEEN SPOTTED

REPEAT WE HAVE FOUND THE BROWNIE

*Kkshhk* You have spotted the brownie in my belly

*Kkshhk* What did you say, stop acting like a fool and admit I ate the brownie for lunch

ABORT ABORT ABORT

*Kkshhk* everyone is on to you. They know you really microwaved it for 30 seconds and ate it while you were on break

Copy that I've been caught

*Kkshhk* Roger dodger

*Kkshhk* Over and out

Update

2009-02-05T07:16:00.000-08:00

Update on the brownies:

There are still two brownies left. It was touch and go there for a while and I was not sure they would survive the night. Somehow they made it safely and I can spend the day knowing my brownies are safe and sound waiting for me at home.

And then God himself blessed me with his magic stick

2009-02-04T18:54:00.000-08:00

Last night I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. I was having a sad day and all I wanted was some brownies. I was telling everyone and there mom about this and finally decided to make some. I marched in my kitchen grabbed what I needed and then promptly began pouting as I realized I had neither vegetable oil or applesauce. So I walked over to my computer and whined to everyone about it. That's when Ginger pops on yahoo with this little link:

ging @ 6:57 http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/food-network-kitchens/smore-brownies-recipe/index.html 6:57 ummm, can there be anything better?

Shannon Mateo @ 7:08 uggg 7:08why do you do that shit to me 7:08 i have everything right now but graham crackers dammit ging @ 7:09 i have everything, included toasted coconut marshmallows, it is taking all the will power i have in the world not to make them right now

At that point her Internet crashed. So I frantically texted her YOU MUST MAKE THESE NOW! She replied that she would but I figured it would be like the time she said she would bring me peach cobbler and didn't, and don't even get me started on the whole "YOU MADE TIRAMISU AND DIDN'T BRING ME ANY FUCKING FUCKER" debacle.

Suddenly an IM pops up
ging @ 11:45 Dude these brownies are like the porn of brownies

My eyes lit up. SHE HAD MADE THE BROWNIES. Now, I just had to make sure they somehow ended up at my house. We chatted a little and she casually asked if I wanted the brownies now or later. While I obviously wanted the brownies 5 hours ago and was ready to come to her house and lick her floor in search of crumbs I very nonchalantly replied "ehh, whenever's clever."

I came home tonight and busied myself with dinner. At one point I decided Ginger forgot me and I would not be getting any delicious brownies. Suddenly my phone made a noise. I had a text. My heart dropped. I just knew it was Ginger texting to say she wasn't coming. I moped over to my phone and read it;

"I'm at your door."

I looked up and sure enough there she was. An angel of God on my door step with the most beautiful little tinfoil package I've ever seen. She came in, we made small talk, I scarfed down my dinner, set my oven to warm and busied myself pretending to look busy. Finally it was time. I pulled out my fork and opened it up.

Today at work I pulled up a picture of the brownies and sadly lamented about how I would probably never taste them.

The most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I had totally forgotten she had the coconut marshmallows. I put my fork in and the marshmallows turned into a beautiful taffy goodness. A long string of marshmallow followed the fork all the way to my mouth.

Oh shit.

Porn of brownies was an understatement. These fuckers are like the porn of life. They are like the best sex you ever had but with toasted coconut marshmallows. Then I poured a glass of milk which was like a tall glass of ohjesusfuckinglordy to go with my brownies. These aren't just porn, these brownies should come with a disclaimer.

WARNING: Eat these brownies with a clean pair of underwear handy because they are that good!

I finished the night thinking that although today was pretty shitty, things were looking up. The rest of the week looks pretty good too because I happen to know I have two more orgasm brownies left.

Snot

2009-02-04T07:53:00.000-08:00

I brought Codi into bed with me around 5am this morning. He snuggled up on my arm and started snoring in my ear. Around 7 I looked over at him because I love to watch him sleep.

Only, thats when I felt it. Snot starting to drip out of my nose. I wanted to reach for a Kleenex but Codi was on my arm.

I had no choice, but to turn my head the other way and let the snot roll back into my brain.

As I lay there this morning I thought, "so that is how this day will be huh....no matter what I do there is going to be snot."

VS

2009-02-03T13:14:00.000-08:00

Do you ever sit there at your desk and stare at your yogurt wishing it was a big fat brick of chocolate?

I hate when I'm at the store and I'm thinking, yogurt and fruit VS chocolate and ice cream. I always make the right choice, get home and think WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T I BUY THE CHOCOLATE. Now, I'm sitting here at work staring at my sons whole grain extra fiber chocolate poptart thinking, "do you think he would miss it if it was gone, because this pineapple yogurt just ain't doing it for me."

I'm fucking exhausted today. For some reason exhaustion makes me feel like hoovering some ramen and chocolate donuts.

But then again, being happy makes me want ramen and donuts. Being sad makes me want ramen and donuts. Anger makes me want a double ramen with a side of donuts. Come to think of it, there is never a time in my life when I'm not thinking about ramen.

What do you suppose they put that stuff? Is it similar to soda? I think they put crank in that stuff because fuck I can't stop thinking about the curly noodly goodness of ramen. I'm like a little ramen addict. I got five bucks how much ramen can I get for that?

My pineapple yogurt is done and it didn't satisfy my craving for sweets, instead it made me want a pineapple upside down cake.

And yes, before you ask, I am on my period and PMSing. What do you want to do about it huh?

Cristina you better fucking get on those brownies.

So how are things going

2009-02-02T21:02:00.000-08:00

First off all, Wednesday will be two weeks on my medicine. I will also up my dose to a full dose that day. Here are my observations on the drug so far.
-It makes me a little drowsy, which will be great later for taking it at night (I can't right now because I still get up with the boys).

-I feel like I sleep better. It takes me a while to fall asleep but when I do it is a really good, deep sleep. I haven't felt that kind of deep dream like sleep in ages. To say that I have a few dreams every night thrills me. They are very detailed but mostly funny dreams. I wake up feeling tired still but I blame that on the getting up with the boys bit.

-I feel like I think a little more before reacting to the boys. I still freak out, but I am able to stop faster and actually so far most days I've been able to process and think and relax and respond better to Brandon. This morning I lost my cool and yelled a little but I immediately recognized what I was doing and stopped. Normally I realize what I'm doing, keep doing it and beat myself up over it.

I wouldn't say that I'm cured, or I've made amazing changes but I do see hope in the future and I do honestly feel like this is going to work.

Next.
Codi is for the most part totally weened. After the weekend he spent with my mom when I went snowboarding I never looked back. I still allow him to nurse once right before bed and that is it. One thing I never saw coming out of all of this is that he actually sleeps better. When we made the decision to put him in bed with Brandon that is also another decision I made and never looked back on. A large part of me thought I would try it for a night, give up and never do it again. Nearly two weeks later and we are still going strong. I put him down and he sleeps from 9 until 1230 usually. Some nights even 2, 3 or 4am. When he wakes up he kinda cries but not a sobbing hysterical cry like he used to do if I put him in his crib. I go in and lay next to him and let him fuss a little and then usually within a few minutes he just fusses right back to bed. I realize I shouldn't say all of this because of course he will turn into a screaming mess, but like I said I have hope.

Weening him has helped him eat too. He still isn't eating a lot but he will eat pancakes, muffins and donuts. I know I know not healthy at all but all of the doctors agreed the important thing is just for him to eat and learn hunger and to ask for food. Which he now does. He wakes up and immediately wants his cup full of milk. I put him in his high chair and right away he demands food. He will say NUM NUM until I make him something. At lunch if he is hungry he tells me NUM NUM and points at the fridge.

The down side to all of this, is his body went into a bit of shock after being on a liquid diet for so long. He's had some constipation and then a few days ago he had his first really solid poop and it scared the shit out of him (ha pun). He was afraid to poop for two days after that because that first one hurt so bad. Yesterday I ended up having to give him a laxative and later even a suppository to help the guy out.

But, he is eating, and again, I have hope!

Finally I want to say how happy I am that we moved Brandon's school. I could never begin to explain how much it has helped him and changed him. He listens moderately better (to us, he listens amazing to the teacher). He is learning and remembering sign language. Today he addressed Rob and I as mom and dad using signs. He tells me no in sign language all the time too. He is drawing all kinds of things and blossoming. His teacher told my husband the other day that Brandon made her day because he reminded her of why she started teaching. They said he is so bright, always the first to answer in circle time and has made huge changes behavior wise. I 100% believe this all came from changing his school.

This weekend we had a large party with about 5 gazillion kids and I was so proud to see Brandon get along with all of them and interact appropriately. I guess I am thankful for this blog, because if his old teacher never would have snooped and found it I never would have had to pull him from that old school.

Anyway, for now, things seem to be doing pretty good. I do see light at the end of the tunnel. This weekend when I was surrounded by a large number of really good female friends and all of our kids played and our husbands hung out and played beer pong and my parents hung out with all of us, I really stopped, took stock of my life and saw, that now that I've weeded out all of the bad seeds, my life is really pretty fucking amazing!

Dad at Superbowl

2009-02-02T17:43:00.000-08:00

We had a very good superbowl party...details to come!

This is the Baby I love you face my husband makes when he gets a little boozed up
(also recipes to come)

When dad cooks dinner

2009-01-31T10:46:00.000-08:00

Spam and rice.

And he ate every bite!

The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth

2009-01-28T19:12:00.000-08:00

So, you may remember me telling you I went snowboarding and tried to drink a Guinness but couldn't. Well, that isn't exactly the whole truth. My husband would like me to tell you the whole truth about that little incident.

We get to the lodge (if you could call the little shack a lodge) and head for the snack bar. Right away we notice a very large selection of beer and that was it. No liquor, no fruity fun girl drinks nothing. Not even a Mikes Hard Lemonade. I look at my husband and say, "which of these taste the least like beer?" He replies with, "I've heard Guinness taste like coffee." Okay fine, one Guinness and one snickers please. (I didn't have Brandon for two days dammit I was eating some peanuts. We walk outside, I take a drink and make a look like......hmmm, similar to a face I imagine some one would make if they licked a dogs asshole. A dogs asshole that had dingle berries!

My husband laughs at me and I mention that I wish they had Blue Moon because I heard it is orangey and then I could stick some orange slice in it. His reply was that he heard people put orange in Fat Tire too. I look up and spy some honey inside. I tell Rob I'm going to go stick honey in my Guinness. He looks at me like I'm bonkers and goes to sit. I walk in, pick up the honey bear and proceed to spend about two minutes trying to make the last 1/4 inch of honey drip into my Guinness. Thats when I hear, "Is that girl seriously trying to put honey in there?" "Yeah she is, what an idiot."

Grrrrr.

I look up and I see an orange. Okay, fine I'm buying that orange and the Fat Tire and starting over. Next thing Rob knows here comes his wife with a Guinness, an orange, a half eaten Snickers and a Fat Tire. At this point he really wants to get up on the mountain since we had waited for his cousin for ever so he just looks at me like I'm fucking nuts. I proceed to peel my orange and begin cramming pieces of it in both beers. Dammit one of these fuckers is going to taste good.

Only.

No one told me orange would make the fucking beer fizz out of the goddamn jar. So here I am beer fizzing and dripping everywhere when my husband is like HEY ASSHOLE THERE ARE PEOPLE WALKING BELOW YOU! I look down and sure as shit I'm dripping beer all over people. I take a taste of the Fat Tire and proceed to start gagging. I go to vomit only I realize that if I do I would be vomiting on the people below me. So I swallow it back down and shove both beers at my husband. He basically tells me to take it like a fucking man, grow some balls and drink that shit. My response?

I dumped those fuckers in the trash, finished my Snickers and went shredding on the hill! So, now you know I DON'T DRINK BEER, NOT EVER, NEVER NO!

What my kid was doing while I was busy taking pictures of Katie's kid

2009-01-27T14:07:00.000-08:00

The weekend Shannon went all out

2009-01-27T12:03:00.000-08:00

I'm supposed to be home doing dishes right now, but my mom wants me to write about my weekend so fine, here....I'll fuss with dishes later.

This weekend in an attempt to start weening Codi I asked my parents to watch the boys all of Saturday and Sunday so Codi could go a while with out mah boobies near him.

Saturday morning Rob and I woke up and had plans to go snowboarding. We headed up to this little hill that his cousin wanted to go too. Her and her husband were beginners so they wanted to go somewhere cheap and simple while they learned. I hadn't been in over 5 years so EASY sounded great to me. We arrived at the hill and went up to the bar to get a drink. I always love to have one hot cocoa and peppermint schnapps before I go...it makes landing on your head hurt less. Only this place was so small they didn't have liquor only beer. Rob informed me that Guinness taste like coffee so I grabbed one. 3 drinks into it I started gagging and had to throw it away because I CAN'T DRINK BEER IT TASTE LIKE SHIT. We headed up the hill and I warned everyone that there was a very very VERY good chance I would wreck getting off the lift. My heart started palpitating as we neared the end of the lift taking us to the top of the bunny hill, THUMP THUMP THUMP and then.....I made it off and didn't fall. My husbands cousin and her husband didn't do as well though. About an hour later we made it down the first hill. Okay really it took about 20 minutes because Robs cousin thought it was faster to fall down the hill then to actually snowboard down. We went back up, again they wrecked getting off and this time her husband actually totally kicked ass down the hill....she decided to unstrap and walk down so we headed off to the bigger hill.

The bigger hill was pretty fun. At one point I said, "look babe I'm totally shredding down the hill." Rob looked at me and said, "carving babe, you're carving, snowboarders don't shred." Whatever I WASN'T falling which was all that matters. Don't let me fool you. At one point we decided to try and find a rock for the guys to jump off of. Thinking I could get there faster I went into the taped off area. Yes, that is taped off for a damn reason. The snow was nothing but powder. 10 FEET DEEP POWDER. Before I knew it my board was sinking and I wrecked. Only when I put my arms down to push up I sunk into the snow up to my shoulders. I took me almost 5 minutes to dig out, shimmy over some, dig out again, shimmy, dig, shimmy dig and then finally I was out. The next ride up the lift you could actually see the 5 or 6 holes I left in the snow. In my opinion it is pretty bad if you can see your wreck site from up on the lift.

Rob found the rock and did a great landing followed by a 3 roll tumble down the hill...which is when we think he lost his Ipod. I did a few more of my sink into the snow and eat shit rolls and Rob's cousins husband ate snow once followed by crashing so bad he lost his hat.

We came down the hill and decided to drive clear across town to try out a pizza place. We got totally stuffed and then we headed home and changed to go to Gingers house warming party. This is where it all went down hill. I had a few drinks and then before we knew it we decided to go to a club. Rob, April, her boyfriend and I called a cab and off we went to the club. I told you about that already.

Sunday rolled around and I ate a lot of ramen and crackers to feel better. I was so proud of myself that I wasn't the least bit sore from snow boarding. Codi came home and was dying to nurse. My boobs were begging to feed him so we compromised. I let him nurse for about 5 minutes before bed and then he slept from 9 until 3:30 which is a huge difference from waking every 2 hours. He is doing well so far sleeping with Brandon (yes I realize I just jinxed it). I let him nurse at 3:30 just to relieve my boobs, but I didn't let him fall asleep nursing. I made him fall asleep on his own. We are really trying here. It is an adjustment for both of us. Last night he woke up around midnight and I was able to rock him back to sleep. At 3 when he woke up again he fell asleep on his own but kept waking up. It was clear he was hungry. I let him nurse and he slept again until 7. Nursing at night is keeping my boobs from exploding and it's also helping the dry up time seem so much easier.

Anyway I went all out this weekend. Snowboarding, dinner with Rob, a party, and a club...damn I go big huh?

Aren't they beautiful

2009-01-26T20:06:00.000-08:00

Observations and other nonsense

2009-01-26T19:36:00.000-08:00

Brandons teacher commented on how he always smells so nice in the morning and how his teeth are always brushed and his clothes are always clean. Umm. Aren't all kids? Do people really take their kids to school in dirty clothes and unclean? Eww.

Weening my first child was easy. He was down to eating every six hours. Codi was eating every two hours needless to say after almost 48 hours of not nursing (I cheated once and nursed for about 4 minutes) my boobs fucking hurt. Fuck man this shit is bad. I'm like Dolly Parton over here. Good lord have mercy on my boobs. They are so big they are rising up and about to touch my chin. I'm filling out an E cup bra and it is about to bust at the seams.

Mine are bigger then this right now.

Codi is slowly testing some things out. Still nothing of quality but he is at least snacking and attempting to drink some milk from a cup (so what if it is strawberry flavor).

I feel like such a mom now. In my Iphone I have the following labels in my Ical: Personal, Work, Bills, KIDS. That's right I now have a label just for my children's appointments and reminders. I am 5 steps away from having one of those giant color coordinated calenders on my refrigerator with sticky notes and what not.

I am not 21 anymore. I can not stay out drinking until 3 am and expect to function the next day. Also....it hurts more when you puke after a night out like that.

Also...when you get that drunk please make someone keep you out of the bathroom so you don't tell anyone and everyone that "THIS is what happens to your boobs when you have kids." Ouch.

It is a bad idea to ask the pit boss of the casino you are partying at if she happens to have a breast pump you can borrow, while you gamble.

It is a worse idea to take someones cigarette from them and put it out on a table cloth.

It is an even worse idea to give someone as drunk as me a flaming dr pepper!

Can you see how this could be bad in the hands of ME!

I've moved on to full mom bag status. I now have a bag big enough to fit all of my stuff, my kids stuff, and even a kid if I wanted. In fact. I'm pretty sure I could put Codi in my new bag. (Note to self try that tonight with camera handy)

Codi is getting too smart. He just found my stash of donuts, grabbed the last one, took the wrapper and ran over and put it in the trash. What a tidy little boy. Well, tidy if you don't count the 300 toys scattered around my office right now.

Cute button up flannel shirts are a great way to hide a muffin top if you had one. Not saying I have one, but if I did I would probably wear a cute button up flannel shirt to work.

(the only known picture of April and I out the other night...I refuse to show you the other pictures of me and strangers because I don't look so hot)

And finally I present to you the text messages I sent to my cousin and Ginger.

To Ginger:
Wwreeeeee
Tacos qi
Fucmex up

To Lisa:
Weeeeeeeeee
Woowoo
plop
ntaox
snow
ya oeq
tacos
ta is
tacos
bens
beans
ok uejd
Ggvdnc
R
Vgennrnrns

SO! That just about sums up my night ehh? To answer your questions, no I never got the tacos I was so craving...I got a sandwich at home instead, that the next morning I discovered I had thrown all over the floor seconds before I crawled upstairs to puke.

My favorite part of the night was my husband pulling my hair back in a hair tie, rubbing my back, bringing me a blankie and informing me my boobs were leaking...and never once did he gag as I puked up sammich and pizza!

Note to self

2009-01-26T16:14:00.000-08:00

Pay better attention when your kid is being quiet!

IT'S BAAAAACK

2009-01-24T10:01:00.001-08:00

I just turned on Noggin to hear the Boinga song. Noooooo please tell me this isn't back. If you want to hear the Boinga song and entertain your baby for hours go to you tube and type in BOINGA. You will thank me later when you are Boingaing in your sleep!

What would I eat

2009-01-24T06:36:00.000-08:00

Breakfast: One perfect piece of toast. One toasted NYC everything bagel with extra lots of cream cheese. A Venti Raspberry vanilla latte from Peet's WITH ALL THE FAT! Biscuits and gravy (no sausage) and Five scones from Bread and Ink in Oregon. Clementine oranges. One more bagel. My breakfast potatoes.

Lunch: One perfect egg salad sandwich on brand new fresh Wonder Bread. Two Jimboys bean tacos. Dark chocolate caramel fredo from Peets. A whole can of Fritos jalapeno cheddar sauce and a bag of blue corn chips. Watermelon. Seven slices of NYC pizza. An avocado. A soy bacon BLT on Wonder bread with extra mayo.

Dinner: A Capresé salad from here. Basil Parmesan mashed potatoes from Dolcé. A very large bowl of Oriental flavored ramen. Cous Cous with butter and Parmesan. The chef salad from the Sandwich Board, sans meat. An artichoke as big as my head. A giant loaf of fresh baked bread. Pesto gnocchi. Spinach artichoke dip as an appetizer. My home made pico de gallo with avocado with chips.

Desert: Chocolate cake with chocolate ganaché. Two scoops of Love Potion #39 from Baskin Robbins. Petite fours. Good amaretto on the rocks. One large bar of Scharffen Berger chocolate. Fresh brownie ends. Chocolate fondu. Six S'mores.

So. That is all I can come up with for now. I am now pretty fucking starving. I'm going to go eat...nothing, cuz I have none of the above at my house.

(The biscuits & gravy from Bread and Ink: Biscuits and Gravy - A fresh baked Biscuit smothered with vegetarian Herb Gravy, Italian Sausage and Tillamook Cheddar Cheese. Served with two Eggs any style. 8.50)

What would you do

2009-01-22T21:11:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow morning when you wake up you will discover that the FDA has discovered a new way of eating. All of the world will survive on nothing but pills. We will gain all nutrition from that. You have. You have one day left of eating real normal food. What do you pick?

I will answer this all for you too. So far, as silly as it seems I know two things. One, I would have to have some sort of Everything bagel toasted with extra plain cream cheese from the bagel store down the street from me. Scratch that, I would fly to NYC for an everything bagel and extra plain cream cheese! Also...I would need some sort of potato...preferably a large one...with cheese and chives and sour cream.

I will work on my final list tonight and give you my final meal tomorrow. But how about you. Please tell me, if today was your last day to eat what would you eat for your final, Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner and of course Dessert?

P.S. for this one day you have UNLIMITED stomach capacity!

P.S.

2009-01-21T18:31:00.000-08:00

Last night was Brandon's turn to take home Curious the Crocodile, which is their pet mascot in class. He had rules, Curious could not take a bath, because if he got wet he would "grow bigger then your house and get mean," and he could not eat people food. We were given a binder that was Curious' journal and told to fill it out with what we did. We took tons of pictures of Curious, glued them on all cute wrote some funny stuff and then Brandon wrote his name and drew some pictures. Two of the photos were of Curious helping bake cookies. I figured, since he helped make them we should take them to school today. When Rob picked up Brandon the teacher told him that she was thrilled with our page in the book. That it was exactly what she hoped parents would do (other pages just had some scribbles and a short entry that wasn't very exciting but we had pictures and cookies.) She then proceeded to tell Rob that in her opinion we were parents of the year for how involved we were and for bringing the cookies as an interaction for Brandons share time with Curious.

HA!!! SOMETIMES IT PAYS TO BE A BROWN NOSER.

I would be lying if I said that I didn't immediately think "I TOTALLY WIN AT THIS DAYCARE SHIT!!!"

Wam Bam Thank you Ma'am

2009-01-21T17:04:00.000-08:00

I went to my annual girl appointment today. I'm going to warn you in advance this post is going to get a little..."ooogy" if you're a boy.

The first thing we talked about was how my period started on the 2nd of January and continued heavily for about 8 days, followed by 11 days of spotting. This is normal for me lately. Heavy periods are normal for me due to my stage four endometriosis. When I say heavy I mean, the kinda heavy where I got overwhelmingly excited to learn that Always had come out with a new super duper ultra mega bad mamajama absorbent pad. Not just heavy, but heavy with a side of golf ball size blood clots and cramps that make you think it might be more fun to stab a knife in your boobs repeatedly then deal with that shit. I've actually had three surgeries for the endometriosis. Each time the scar tissue is worse, my uterus is worse and well, generally everything is worse. After the problems with my last pregnancy I obviously knew things were going to go from bad to worse. Along with the spotting and cramping, I've been having another type of cramping, a "something bads going on down there" cramping. I explained to my midwife about this and her response was, "Shannon you were bleeding for 19 days and you didn't think to call us?" I replied with, "well I just figured this was normal for all of my problems."

Next she did my exam and declared my uterus, "rock hard." Before I knew it I was being set up for a consult with my doctor to have my uterus removed. Not the whole shebang, I'm too young to deal with hormones, just the uterus. I'm actually fine with this. My tubes are tied, and there is only so many yearly abdominal surgeries a person can take, and hey no more periods forever SIGN ME RIGHT UP HUH?

Next up we chatted about Codi and his whole NOT EVER GOING TO WEEN THING. She told me that my best bet with him is going to be going cold turkey on the nursing. She also advised me that after a year breast milk alone with no food is not enough to sustain him so to hurry my ass up with the weening.

Finally we rolled around to discussing ME! She asked how I was, and I gave her honest answers. I'm a short fuse, a fire cracker, a ball of anger, or tears, or sadness, but mostly anger. We talked about how easily I snap and over react, or yell or....grab a couple of Tylenol PM's to get away from it all. She asked me if I would be willing to try Zoloft. She said it is the most researched as far as breastfeeding plus as a bonus it usually helps with vertigo. Oh and IT MIGHT DECREASE MY APPETITE. Shit, if this pill was covered in chocolate I might marry it. Long story short my husband is picking up my prescription right now.

I'm happy getting the prescription from her. I have appointments with three psychiatrists, but what makes me the most comfortable is that Mary (the midwife) has known me for over 12 years now and she knows me so well. She was the first person to suggest drugs to me, and through the years has always given me other remedies be it herbal or mental to help with my anxiety and general craziness. In the end I'd rather get medicine from someone I trust as much as her then from some person I just met.

So. Here is to hoping things get better. Hopefully I'm still funny on the drugs (I'm funny right?) But most of all I just hope I'm happy, and, less of a jerk. Because seriously you should ask my husband about the fight I started over fish sauce...The fact that he hasn't run away screaming yet speaks volumes because....I be a lunatic y'all!

I may be a sucker but I'm a sucker who follows through

2009-01-20T21:23:00.001-08:00

My kid suckered me into baking cookies tonight by challenging whether or not I even knew how to cook em!

NOTE TO SELF DO NOT LET CHILD TURN ON THE KITCHENAID!

OR ELSE!!!

(If you are wondering why he is wearing two different pairs of jammies it is because today was pajama day at school so he actually wore one pair to school, and then one pair after his bath. The cookies had to refrigerate while he took a bath)

This is Curious the Crocodile. It is their class mascot and tonight was Brandon's night to take him home. So far Curious has played games, played trains, watched Brandon take a bath, help bake cookies and taking a flying leap down the stairs.

They turned out so big and fluffy

You must dunk your cookies in some nilk

(Yes papa, we will bring you some cookies to work tomorrow!)

Too fucking smart

2009-01-20T18:30:00.001-08:00

Brandon: mom you don't know how to make cookies do you

Me: sure I do

Brandon: then make me some cookies mom

DAMMIT. Walked right into that.

Sent from my iPhone

Hope

2009-01-20T09:45:00.000-08:00

Today is a good day. I have hope!

I'm going to spend a good portion of my lunch break calling doctors until I find one who can see me quick, like yesterday! Time to nip this in the bud before it gets worse. Who am I kidding it is worse, so I guess um time to fix it before it gets impossible.

In other news the other day at work my dad has both boys and they are in the back of the office where the playroom is just screwing around. Suddenly I hear my dad coming down the hall saying:
"I didn't do it"
"I didn't do it"
"Remember I didn't do it"

And then.....

Sigh. So I ask Brandon who drew on his face. His reply was obviously CODI! Finally he admitted he himself had done it. So I ask who colored on Codi's face and papa says "Brandon." But Brandon says "Noooo papa color on Codi's face."

Who do you think I believe...yes, the three year old!

Update

2009-01-18T21:26:00.001-08:00

Slow churn Thin Mint ice cream and wine don't taste good together!

Also, it makes me soo sad that Codi is getting to big to fit in his baby towels. Fucking kids, why do they grow up so fast?

Also, I'm tying to change my music weekly so give me feedback. Do you like the tunes I'm playing, do you have suggestions, anything special you would like to hear?

Trying something different

2009-01-18T20:59:00.000-08:00

I had plans for today. Switch around the boys rooms, clean the house and go to the park. It all happened even if Codi and I didn't get to go to the park. As you can see, Codi is trying out his new sleeping digs. We will see how this works.

Codis room got moved around. We got rid of his crib (which is now for sale), put in Brandon's old twin bed and made it all cutesy. While I call it Codi's room it is really my guest room for single people.

I made some great Tilapia this weekend. If you want the recipe you can find it here.

I spent the weekend shopping. My cousin let me know about some great sales. I came home with 2 GIANT slabs of pork spare ribs and two tri tips for $40.00. I had to trim the tri tip myself which was good because I was able to leave a lot of fat on for flavor. I know a lot of people are afraid of fat on meat, I'm not because I happen to know it adds flavor during cooking and DUH!!!! You can always cut it off later.

I called my insurance company after my last post and found out there is some sort of glitch in their online system and there are in fact about 20 doctors here in Reno who I can see. I found one I was very interested in seeing. I called left a message and received a call back only to be told he is not accepting patients for therapy. Well what the fuck do you accept patients for? I have a list of doctors to call now. I do not want a woman and I don't want to drive far which greatly decreases my list.

I'm becoming worse. It is obvious now. I'm unhappy. I'm short. I don't give a shit what I'm eating. I'm just not happy. I really hope I can get in with someone soon and get this shit under control because living in my head is getting hard. Currently my house is clean, I have no laundry, no dishes, no clutter nothing (thanks to me and my awesomeness today) and yet I feel overwhelmed, crushed, under pressure and anxious. Sigh!

My husband pushed every fucking button today and currently the thought of being nice to him sounds as appealing as stabbing my toe with needles.

I'm watching a cake show now and I'm wondering why don't I have cake under my bowl of ice cream?

I'm currently in search of a bag. When I was in Vegas I found a bag that I thought I liked. I left it at the store. After a series of events the bag is being sent to me. The problem is, I have found a bag I love more, that is Lucky (I can't find a fucking photo online) that I know I would keep longer. I need a bag. A BIG bag. I need something that keeps everything in one place. I need this because this past month I've lost, shot records, insurance cards, grocery bags, and other important things, like CHECKS AND GIFT CARDS!

I find it amusing that I really don't blog on weekends anymore. When I started this whole thing I used to blog every day. I was worried that if I didn't I would lose readers. Now I'm smart enough to know that I'm good enough to miss a few days and y'all will come back. I also know that Google reader makes it hard for you to forget me. But hey, click my page from your google reader y'all and see new things I've done.

Oh, did I mention, my new page is almost done. Actually, it's done, it works but it is being tweaked. It is beautiful though and one day, you'll click on this page, expect to see this page but you will see my new page with my fancy new link.

Okay well, I've got ice cream to eat and wine to drink and TV to watch because I have done a lot of shit today and I deserve some indulgences!

Brown butter Gnocchi with spinach and pine nuts

2009-01-15T19:41:00.000-08:00

Recipe is here

One of those days

2009-01-15T12:47:00.000-08:00

I just spent a good 3 minutes in the kitchen at work freaking out because I couldn't remember if my lunch took a minute and a half to microwave or if it was 90 seconds. Yes. It is that kind of day.

Codi has only had two doses of iron but already he is presenting me with some AWESOME black tar diapers, I'm sure he will never do it for Rob though because that's just my luck.

I hate the new year at work. I am posting invoices and half are 2008 the other half 2009. That means that when I'm in 08 and then get an 09 invoice if I don't' think first I'll post it as 01.08.08. Which will then produce A YEARS WORTH OF FINANCE CHARGES FOR A CUSTOMER.

To top it all off, I just pulled up the provider list for my insurance. There is not ONE SINGLE psychiatrist covered on my insurance with in 50 miles of me.

Great day.

Today

2009-01-14T13:31:00.001-08:00

Monday we had Codi's evaluation for the whole REFUSING TO EAT INCEDENT. I had prepared myself for the worst. Surely there would be something wrong with my kid. Which, I suppose would be good because then he would be approved for treatment. When we arrived I realized that I did not have my insurance card, which means some doctors office somewhere does. I find that highly irritating because they clearly know they have it and haven't mailed it back. Jerks. I called Rob and had him give me all of the info off his card and filled out the other 100 papers.

Finally two ladies came back and got Codi and me. We went into a room with the cutest wee little table and chairs and sat down on the floor. One lady told me she would concentrate on asking me stuff, while the other lady worked with Codi. Codi walked over to a chair, pulled it out, climbed up and sat down at the table. The lady followed his cue and pulled out her arsenal of things. I answered my questions as best as I could with out being to obvious that I was watching Codi's every move. Suddenly the lady working with Codi stopped and gave the lady talking to me a look and the evaluation was over. The two ladies informed me that Codi was actually advanced for his age, and because of this they couldn’t continue the evaluation and he was not eligible to work with their food people or nutritionists. Their answer to everything was to wean. They said he eats too often to ever actually feel hunger. To start doing longer stretches between feedings and then to eventually drop feeding him for lunch. They also suggested putting him and Brandon in bed together so that Codi would still feel like he was with someone with out smelling breast milk. That was the end of that.

This weekend Rob and I plan to take the queen size guest bed out of Codi’s room and move it into Brandons room. Then put Brandons cute twin bed in Codi’s room. We are also going to move the train set and toy box into Codi’s room, in essence creating a sleeping room and a toy room. I do plan to purchase Brandon’s bedding in queen size so his room stays with it’s theme and he doesn’t feel like he is losing his special bed. The upside is, the bed they are getting is stupidly comfortable.

I took Codi to the doctor today to follow up on his blood work and talk about his cold that won’t go away. Turns out little dude is anemic. Great. I talked to the doctor about weaning and he said he absolutely agrees but to wait to fully skip a meal until he is no longer sick. He did love my idea about extending the amount of time between feedings giving him a chance to be hungry. At the end of our talk I asked him personally about medication I could take for my “crazy.” He said that there is actually a lot I can take and he was realllllly sorry his nurse had told me no so many times. His advice was for me to start seeing someone and find out what medicine they are interested in giving me, then call him personally and he will say yes or no, and make suggestions from there. He also said that it was a great idea to start now because some of the medications will decrease my breast milk, which will help with the weaning.

So. That is where I stand now. I need to find a doctor and start the road to a new life. I’m exciting at the possibility of this all finally happening. I spent over an hour crying to my husband on the couch the other day about EVERYTHING. Seriously I probably talked to him about 20 different things. Between him, and my friends I know that we have all come to a consensus that SHANNON NEEDS HELPS.

Also between talking to Rob and talking to Ginger it is very very clear that I never came out of the last funk. I thought I did but I realize now that I just kind of shoved it down and hoped it would go away. Bottling things up seems to have made them MUCH WORSE.

My hopes are, that talking to someone and getting medicine will finally help this all go away.

Here’s to hoping right?

Come out come out wherever you are

2009-01-12T16:19:00.001-08:00

It is delurking day! Yay. So stop by, leave me a comment let me know you are here and I'll come by and repay the favor!

Idiot proof

2009-01-09T12:05:00.000-08:00

The other night I went to Babies R Us with Katie. While shopping I noticed the Nuby Sippy cups I had been wanting to try out for Codi. Tossed some in the cart, grabbed some apple juice and other "necessary" items and off we went. 20 minutes later I finally left the parking lot. Why? Because that is how long it took me to open the goddamn fucking packing on the new slut cups. Seriously. I tried everything. I tried chewing through it. Sawing the plastic with my keys. Prying it with my fingers (hello paper cut thanks for that). NOTHING. Finally I bent one of the little handles and that bitch popped out. I was so fucking mad. The whole time I was fussing with it I was on the phone with my mom who clearly thought I was in some sort of bad mood. Which, I WAS BECAUSE HELLO THEY ADULT PROOFED MY FUCKING SIPPY CUP. You know, I get child proofing things, but seriously what is the fucking point of adult proofing shit? I mean, really how much can an adult woman injure herself with a goddamn cup?

In other news I'm baby sitting Katies baby Dylan until April. he is a good baby. Like a really good baby. The only time he ever cries is when he is hungry. And then, whoah, he's a good cryer, tears and all but we barely even see him cry since we have this whole breast milk thawing thing down to a science. We keep water boiling on low and then pour it over the milk baggie in a bowl and about 14 seconds later we have a bottle. Since Dylan wakes up all smiley we usually have plenty of time to make a bottle before he even gets mildly annoyed. Anyway the point is, today I'm home with both of them instead of at work. Why? Because Codi is still being a fucking demon spawn and cries if he can't see me, or if the wind blows wrong. Well today they are in a farting competition. Every ten seconds one of them farts. Codi is adding some flair by doing a squat fart or a kick fart. Either way it stinks and someone bring me a gas mask k! Did I mention that Katies child is a tank? He can go through 20 oz of milk from 11am until 4pm AND STILL BE HUNGRY. We call him tank, or moose. Y'all his thighs are almost as big as mine. I have been watching him for 3 weeks now and I am still not exactly sure how many thigh rolls he has. Either way he is really good and I love watching him...minus the farting part.

(Dylan looks this happy ALL THE TIME PEOPLE)

Oh and then there is this. This is portraits of a SUCKER!

Normally Brandon eats hot lunch at school. This is because his first teacher suggested doing what other kids did so he didn't feel left out. Only, now at his new school all the kids pack lunch. So, this week we have been packing lunch. My mom said she was running to Walmart and asked if I needed anything. I asked for some Strawberries for Brandons lunch. She came home with this.

Yes. Those are tiny bags of tiny marshmallows. They come in regular, strawberry or chocolate. And yes those are tiny bags of Dora cookies and I swear don't even get me started on the fruit roll ups and scooby snacks. This is a dieters nightmare, which I assume is why she came home with 100 calorie packs for me too. She said that Papa and Brandon got a little crazy in the snack isle. A LITTLE CRAZY, MY GOD THEY BOUGHT THE WHOLE DAMN STORE! Can't take those two anywhere, and my mom totally lets them get away with it too!

I for see a lot of fighting going on at lunch time now. I mean seriously, imagine being the kid whose mom packed some shitty sandwich and chips and then looking over into Brandon's lunch box. Today he had organic Bernie O's in his little crayola thermos. Organic milk in his favorite cup. Organic string cheese. Gogurt in cotton candy blue flavor (can't all be organic right). Mini chocolate marshmallows and fresh cut strawberries. This week he has had spaghetti, mini pancakes with syrup for dipping, sliced cheeses, etc. I am dreading the first time some kid sees Dora cookies in Brandon's lunch box and tries to trade him for shitty carrot sticks or something.

And finally. This weeks theme at school was dental hygiene. So for show and tell Brandon brough each of his friends two of his favorite flossers. Pink and orange for girls and blue and green for boys, all bagged up pretty. My mom and him bought and bagged these last night while I stayed home dealing with the SCREAM MONSTER!

I'm very tired because Codi didn't go to bed until 3:20 this morning. Then at 3:27 my goddamn cell phone rang. They left a message that consisted of dead air. I made Rob go get my phone because Codi had just passed out on me. He got it and I was so fucking mad to find out I didn't know who it was and their message was fake. Dude, if you are going to call me at 3:30 in the fucking morning you better be dying or well, DYING! Codi woke up every half hour after that so I'm tired and this post is probably full of grammatical errors.

P.S. while I was typing this Dylan blew out his diaper and pooped all the way up to his armpits (serious) and all over his clothes! That's what I get for saying how good he was.

We're having chicken for dinner

2009-01-09T11:42:00.001-08:00

I just posted a couple great chicken recipes over on the food blog. Hop on over and see!

Looking for a few good Girl Scouts

2009-01-08T09:40:00.000-08:00

So I'm still here. I'm done dying. I'm just, ummm, kinda flopping around like a fish out of water but definitely not dying. I went to the doctor finally for some drugs and it went like this.

Doctor: Okay so you are wheezing, have a terrible cough and for sure need some antibiotics. So here have some Augmentin.
Me: Okay
Doctor: How about some cough syrup with Codine? Nope never mind your nursing. How about something for your vertigo, let me check.
(Checks THREE different drugs and finds that no I can't take fucking any of them)
Doctor: Wow that is pretty sad, life sucks for you right now. Hmmm, I can't even give you an inhaler for the wheezing. This is terrible. First you have to be pregnant and now your nursing which makes you stuck being able to take nothing.
Me: Yeah tell me about it huh.
Doctor: Okay aha this pill says it is safe, but it has a very low rate of working for vertigo, but it's only $4.00 so why the hell not try it.
Me: Sounds promising thanks!

I came back to work only to find out Codi has what I had. Since he is a boy that obviously means he is the most whining, sad, angry, MAN about this whole thing. Seriously, I can see the Rob coming out in him with this one, because y'all my husband realllly goes all out when he is sick with the whining. If Codi keeps it up I will need to call the whambulance soon.

In other news I'm doing great with my fitness and diet goals already this year. However, I'm smart enough to ask in advance WHERE THE FUCK ARE ALL THE GIRLSCOUTS! Seriously. What happened to the days when girls would come knock on your door and sell cookies. None of my employees have kids either. Okay not true, one has like 17 kids but his wife is too lazy to do something like put her kids in Girl Scouts, which means I HAVE TO SUFFER PEOPLE AND I GET NO COOKIES!

So. My dear readers do any of you have girls selling cookies? If so I will totally paypal you some money for them. I need about 6 boxes of Thin Mints (seriously I freeze them) and then some of the other new fangled kinds. I swear if you guys tell me that none of you are selling cookies, well I'm going to kick some ass. I sooo don't have the patience to wait for them to be on sale outside the store this year. Plus last year they totally put two different troops outside. One when you walked in and one when you walked out. Which meant you either had to buy from each of them or disappoint two groups of girls. I got suckered a lot last year.

Also totally unrelated. The other night at about 3am Codi woke up and projectile vomited in my bed. Rob changed the sheets while I changed Codi and took his temperature. Later, we got back in bed. Rob had put my 600 thread count Egyptian Cotton sheets on. He leans over and says, "I kind of liked the flannel ones, they were warm." SO, I know my kid was sick and all but at that moment I swear all I was thinking was "I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO I WIN I WIN YOU LIKE MY SHEETS SUCK IT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I WAS RIGHT NEENER NEENER YOU LOVE MY SHEETS." What I replied was, "I know they are nice huh." But I swear my head was screaming the whole time that I HAD WON! The next day he went so far as to text me to ask if I had washed the sheets because he "missed" the flannel ones! There might have been an I win dance when I received that text!

So to sum up. I'm still sick, my child has morphed into a whiney sick monster demon spawn, I would like to order Girl Scout cookies from anyone ordering them, and I WIN!

*I realize it is not yet Girl Scout season, I'm just putting in my request in advance.

Budget friendly cooking

2009-01-06T10:21:00.000-08:00

I posted some great tips for budget friendly cooking along with a recipe over on the tasty blog. Check it out. Last nights stuffed shells recipe was part of this weeks meals that make more then one! Here is the link.

To clarify for Angie

2009-01-05T21:01:00.000-08:00

Angie and I were chatting tonight and I feel the need to clarify. I don't swallow the shit I cough up simply because I'm to much of a lady to hock a loogie I REALLY REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW. I physically can not do it. Instead I make a weird gagging choking noise and then swallow the junk in defeat. I assume, it is because I was too much of a lady back in the day to figure it out. Either way it drives me goddamn bonkers!

Hungry?

2009-01-05T19:56:00.000-08:00

Sausage stuffed shells

Vegetarian spinach stuffed shells

Still here...still dying

2009-01-04T18:22:00.001-08:00

I just arrived back from an over night trip to San Francisco. It was supposed to be a two night trip however we left a day late due to the DYING THING! Our plan was to leave yesterday at 8am. So, at 8am I rolled out of bed. At 8:01 am I rolled back into bed and pretended I was not awake. I finally dragged my ass downstairs. I came down and laid down next to Rob on the couch whining. He informed me it was time to get ready. So I marched right upstairs and got back in bed. Rob = not impressed. I laid there while he packed and then after her gave me a look that said, "get your shit together now woman" I got up, snuck into the guest bedroom and got in that bed!

After 10am we finally left.

I spent most of the time in San Francisco laying on the futon pouting about my terrible vertigo, and gagging. Every time I cough it makes me want to puke. The vertigo feels similar to being drunk off vodka. Because being drunk off vodka is much different then, say, wine. It feels kind of like I'm a ticking crash bomb waiting to happen. Meaning at any second I'm going to crash into a wall, or a chair, or....a Christmas tree.

I also spent a good amount of time fixated on one a half hairs I forgot to shave. Not just this once either, I've obviously forgotten to shave these bad boys for a good month or so. One of them I must have half shaved about 3 weeks ago because it is just a weeeee bit shorter. SEE! FIXATED.

This morning I woke up and remembered that I can't hock a loogie. Which is all fine because I am a lady y'all. However, when I'm sick, and I wake up and cough up some shit because I'm such a lady I have no choice but to swallow it because home girl don't know how to hack that shit up! Instead, I cough and cough some more, till I choke on it. Then, of course I swallow it and then get a look on my face like....well, like someone who just swallowed a fucking loogie!

We drove home and in an effort to keep Rob awake we played taboo from my cellphone. It was a lot of me saying, "okay babe it's like that thing, that's, you know (insert hand gesture here)." Which led him to say, "I'm driving I can't see you." So obviously I would just shove my hands closer into his face and say "LIKE THIS!"

Describing Dennis Rodman (can't say basketball, his team name, nose ring or...something else)
Me: He's that gay bouncyball player who was married to Carmen Electra
Rob: Bouncy ball?
Me: Yes
Rob: Who was married to her, he's gay?
Me: Well he's something, but he ain't straight...he's ummm, got one of these (points to nose ring)
Rob: Oh oh oh um uh ooo ooo ooo
Me: Umm, it is like your name with a "D"
Rob: Dod, dod, dob, bod,
Me: ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW
Rob: oooooo Rod
Me: Yeah and your another word for a guy
Rob: Rodman Rodman yeah RODMAN shit whats his name
Me: It's like your Uncle
Rob: (names every uncle but the one named Dennis)
Me: Are you really fucking serious?
Rob: OOooo Dennis Rodman...oh yeah he is sooo not straight.
Me: That took to long.

Or, describing "Special Olympics"

Me: OO OO IT'S SOMETHING YOU COULD DO
Rob: Be amazing
Rob: Be awesome
Rob: Be the best
Me: NO Umm, there's these five little ring things
Rob: I soooo could not be in the Olympics
Me: You could be in this kind
Me: You know, think, like important
Rob: THE SPECIAL OLYMPICS...THAT'S NOT NICE!
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Anyway we are home now. I'm still dying. To make things better I'm also on my period. So I'm dying and hemorrhaging all at once. I feel like I have a mixture of the flu with a side of DEATH ON TOAST. I said that this morning while eating Robs aunts pancakes and she asked me if that meant I wanted toast?

Did I tell y'all that I puked on myself the other night? Yeah. I was peeing and realized I had to pee. I reached over and grabbed the trash but I vomited so much and so fast I puked more on myself then in the trash. All over my clean new pants, my socks, the toilet mat, the floor, the toilet, the cabinets and the trash. Can you believe I missed that bad? It was so embarrassing. I went into the bathroom fully clothed and came walking out in nothing but my underwear and shirt. Rob probably thought I shit myself or something. I told him later how I puked on myself and he said he's never done that, he usually turns around and just pukes in the toilet. I almost died. Could you imagine, you just went potty, then you turn around and puke and the potty water splashes out on you? OH HELL NO! Especially because I know men only sit when they poop. Oh yeah I'm going to make myself sick in a minute.

Needless to say this week has not been good. Also I don't know how many more times I can go potty without Rob figuring out that I might be (pooping). He asked me the other day if I was and I replied " I WILL SO NEVER EVER EVER TALK TO YOU ABOUT POOPING!

So, if my husband asks I'm just going pee a lot okay!

The stroller that is no more

2009-01-01T16:28:00.000-08:00

Forgive me for my lack of posting. I'm stuck at home sick, with a whining sick husband, a sick toddler and a destructive one year old. With out further ado I present the story of the stroller that is no more.

I have a lot of strollers. My favorite stroller is my Jeep jogging stroller. However, it is a little bulky for my trunk so I purchased one of those junky umbrella strollers because it was the smallest thing I could put in my car. That broke so I went looking for something else. I bought this Baby Trend. It folded small, had trays and a nice compartment under it. I used it for a long time. After Codi was born I decided to look for something small that would fit in Robs Honda trunk. I purchased this Graco (in brown). That stroller was the worst ever. The seat didn't sit up all the way and the wheels kept locking up. I received a free cheap umbrella stroller and we used that instead. I had always wanted a double stroller but for one reason or another I didn't buy one. I would tell myself, "I made it this far with out one I don't need it." Of course then I would encounter another moment where I found myself cursing my idiot self for not buying the fucking stroller. Once I went to the store and had it in the cart and everything but couldn't do it because I thought it was too much money to spend on a stroller that I probably would never use anyway. That very night I found myself at Hot August Nights with two kids and only one stroller. Like always my three year old was crying that he was tired and he wanted in the stroller. How about the time I found myself on a walk around the mountain with Codi in the stroller and Brandon tired and whining to get in. He wanted in so bad in fact that the poor little guy ended up trying to climb in the little basket underneath and ride down the hill. In the end Ginger had to tempt him with a race to get him down the hill with out screaming. Again, I stood there kicking myself for not buying a double stroller, alas, I stuck with my cheap ones and told myself I would definitely not need one after this.

A few weeks ago my mom, a friend and I went to Scheels to do some shopping. We took Robs car which meant we were stuck with the shitty umbrella stroller. Halfway through the shopping trip the stroller stopped working. The wheels wouldn't spin we were having to shove it across the floor etc. It was a pain. My mom and I decided I was going to throw it away as soon as I got home. It was a good stroller, it lasted a while but it was done. I threw it away and went out and bought a new $19.99 umbrella stroller. I came home and promptly got in trouble by my husband because we are supposed to discuss purchases with each other. The next day I returned it. Because I had written a check I was given a gift card, that Codi actually dumped out of my purse later that month along with a $100.00 check. I found it funny that after all that with Rob, we were still out the $20.00 anyway. This left us with my beloved Jeep stroller, the nice one that folded small but worked wonky, and the shitty Graco that both kids hated.

Last week when we decided to fly to Vegas I decided we needed two strollers since we would be walking the strip and what not. The Jeep one would be too big in the car so we took the two shitty ones. The second we arrived at the airport I knew this would be a problem as one of the strollers wouldn't move. We pushed on and continued anyway. The whole trip was a constant struggle. We found ourselves arguing over who had to push the shitty stroller, and the kids fought over who got to sit in the one that at least sat all the way up with out having to lay down.

Our second to last day there we went to the outlet malls. My dad got stuck pushing the shitty stroller with faulty wheels. He grumbled about it the entire time a lot of threatening to smash it into walls or just leave it. My mom had located an Old Navy cart with a kid seat and started pushing Brandon around in that. He loved it. I ran to one last store and everyone else waited for me at the top of the escalators. That was when Rob called me asking me why our stroller was left 30 feet away in a corner. I said, "well, my dad kept saying he was going to throw it away, he must have." I was thinking they were just joking around. Sure enough I came up the escalator and found the stroller discarded in a corner. Off they went, my son in the Old Navy cart and all of our bags piled up in the cart portion of it. The next thing I know they had loaded the damn cart up in our rental car and decided they were going to take it home. They also decided they wanted to take it down on the strip with us later that night.

.....

No. I am not kidding, my mom wanted to push around an Old Navy cart on the Las Vegas strip. I explained firmly that I was not pushing my child around in that. They came up with various other ideas, painting it for my aunt to push her dogs in, flying it home to use in Reno, etc. Finally my dad said he wanted to buy a new stroller. I said okay and off we went to Babies R Us. I showed them the $19.99 umbrella stroller I had returned and they dismissed it. Before I knew it my dad was looking at double strollers. They had them all pulled out, they were pushing them and maneuvering them and so on. I showed them all the features of each one (I've done a lot of research on them) and before I knew it they decided we needed this stroller. They also decided they were going to build it right there in the store. The next thing I know they pried open the box dumped it out and wheels and parts went rolling everywhere. My dad and uncle McGyvered it together with a set of keys and a borrowed screw driver (not the right kind). We paid, rolled our new stroller out into the parking lot and were ready to go. Just one problem though.

There was a giant fucking OLD NAVY CART in our trunk. My mom did not want to get rid of it at all. She really wanted to keep it because "Brandon" liked riding in it. Sadly we drove away leaving her beloved cart in the Babies R Us parking lot. Both boys were thrilled with their new stroller. They loved sitting next to each other. I liked that I could recline only one side if only one kid slept. It maneuvers like a dream. I shit you not it steers amazingly. We got home and the very next day loaded it up to go to the mall. Brandon was thrilled to be able to go in the stroller too and not just watch Codi get wheeled around.

So that folks is the story of how my stroller got left in Vegas and I came home with this!

** Please note, the Old Navy shopping cart is not a cart like you would find at a grocery store. I've looked all over the internet for a picture of this thing. It has a cute child seat up front, similar to a stroller with a long basket in the back meant for tossing clothes in it. I'm going to keep searching for a picture of this damn thing though.

**UPDATE!!** Mandy (whose blog link won't work) sent me a picture of the cart my mom was trying to bring home with us, it is the one on the right. Can you imagine if the blog ended with me saying TADA THIS! IS MY NEW STROLLER!

The blanket

2008-12-31T20:18:00.000-08:00

Codi's Christmas present from my mom. She made this for him. We went back and forth on themes and finally settled on this one. Make sure you check out the back.

Isn't it cute? It is super soft and Codi loves it! She hand embroidered all of the little squares too! The top pattern is one I loved at the fabric store. The bottom one is actually a swatch from a blanket she saw at Target.

Hello from my death bed (the couch)

2008-12-30T21:34:00.001-08:00

Am too lazy to locate computer. Am so very sick. The good sick you know where snot drips freely from your nose. So freely that at one point while laying down snot actually dripped in perfect little drops onto my pillow. Which left me wondering if I should change the cover or just be lazy and flip it. Bet you know what I chose. I also have a rocking sexy cough that makes me pee a little if I cough too hard. My throat is so raw that breathing makes me cough.

Plus eating healthy sucks when you are sick. I stared longingly at my ramen today as I fixed my low. Al low sodium low taste soup.

I tried to take a nice shower but there wasn't enough hot water so I just ended up grumpy after that.

I've spent a large part of my day with tissue crammed up my nose. Codi is being a total shit head though and having a blast pulling it out of my nose. He also bit my nipple with his three and a half teeth today which absolutly did not help matters.

Finaly I'm having a massive case if vertigo right now. So I'm spinning as I type.

So that's where I am. Here I am. Here on my couch feeling sorry for myself.

Sent from my iPhone

They story of the pan

2008-12-28T21:08:00.000-08:00

I've got a gazillion things to tell you about Vegas. But until I rest more and upload photos you get nothing but the story of the pan.

First of all, I went to Vegas for Christmas. I did not tell anyone because I always feel weird letting people know I'm gone and that my house is sitting there with no one in it. Back in August at Brandons birthday my aunt and my mom got to talking. They were chatting about Burning Man (you know the big naked boobie hippie love fest in the desert). My mom was explaining how she thought my aunt would love burning man. Since it was only a month away and it would cost a lot for my aunt to come back she proposed a deal. She would go to burning man if we would go to Vegas for Christmas. Long story short, there is an entire photo album of this years burning man I don't want to see and I spent Christmas in a wet and freezing Las Vegas.

I had a few things that were non negotiable for the trip. We had to go to outlet malls, take Brandon to the Shark show and eat at Sweet Tomatoes (my pants still haven't recovered from the food this trip). Finally outlet shopping day came and we spent a ridiculous amount of time driving to Primm Mall. At Aeropostal I got a shit ton of clothes 40%-70% off. At Converse I scored 2 awesome pairs of shoes for Brandon for only $19.99 each (normally $30.00). I hit the jackpot at American Eagle, Lucky and more. Bath and Body Works was a goldmine. Then finally WILLIAMS SONOMA! Most of the store was 40% off. Some even 70% off. However, my favorite part was that the entire collection of All-Clad was 50% off. I nearly died. Here I was on the most limited budget of my life and EVERY SINGLE PAN I ever wanted was half price. I went there for one item only. The 8" non stock fry pan. I call it an egg pan, because it is the perfect size to hand flip an egg in. The pan was originally $89.99 but it was 50% off. The kicker? There was an invisible ding in the pan so they offered me an additional 10% off. That means my $89.99 pan cost $39.95!!! The remainder of the store was on sale also. Let me show you everything else I got and the original prices.

Non stick fry pan $89.99
Professional full size sheet pan $29.95
Professional cookie sheet (mine was smaller) $19.95
Loaf pan $16.00
Pyrex 8x8 glass baking dish $10.00
Extra large spatula $9.00
Christmas dishtowels $7.00
Peppermint bark $26.50
Peppermint Kitchen Candle $24.50

I believe that is all we got, I can't be sure but I know for sure we got this much. The grand total, not on sale is $232.89. With tax that makes it a total close to $250.00. Guess how much we paid? Tax and everything $113.00!!!!! Holy shit batman. We got a minimum of 9 items for nearly the price of my one pan.

Needless to say I LOVE OUTLET MALLS!

Coming later this week, photos of the blanket my mom made. The food of Las Vegas. The malls that weren't discount cheapy ones! Our rad Christmas gifts, and the best ice cream I ever had that I'll never get to have again (hello Fresh and Easy please move to Reno! My favorite story that is coming? The tale of the stroller that is no more!

Merry Christmas

2008-12-25T13:40:00.000-08:00

Can u hear me now

2008-12-23T07:15:00.001-08:00

Dear asshole guy at the airport on your phone. We can all hear you stop talking so loud. Also it is obvious you are a tool and you are single. The lady on the phone doesn't like you. Stop bragging about what a fucking idiot you are. Stop talking about how much you dont understand the housing market. No she doesnt want to meet up when you get in town stop asking over and over how many more ways can she say NO. Your weesely laugh is annoying as fuck. We are all laughing at you. Next time maybe learn to talk a little quieter.

Sent from my iPhone

Airport

2008-12-23T06:38:00.001-08:00

I'm at the airport watching my parents plane take off with my kid in it. While I understand that the little truck shooting steam at the plane is most likely a safety thing that doesn't mean a little part of me isn't screaming OH SHIT their plane caught fire look at the smoke. In fact that is what I did for the first two minutes till I realiWd what was happening. They should maybe warn us here in the terminal that no folks the plane isn't on fire this is a standard procedure. Cuz homegirl was freaking out

Sent from my iPhone

REGULATORS

2008-12-20T19:16:00.000-08:00

SO! Ginger and I are baking (pictures of that later). I have tried my 19048th cup of cocoa and eaten my weight in cookie dough. Needless to say I'm on a good sugar high. Which is why, when Tootsie Roll came on my Ipod I found myself in the living room re-enacting my cheer leading days. So. With out further ado I present

SHANNON DOES CHEERLEADING JUMPS!

READY

OKAY

NOT SO TOE TOUCH!

SHE LANDED IT

BARELY

THIS CONCLUDES OUR LESSON IN OLD LADIES WHO SHOULD NOT BE ATTEMPTING CHEERLEADING JUMPS

(NOT PICTURED, THE PHOTO WHERE GINGER SNAPPED THE PICTURE AT THE EXACT TIME THAT BOTH OF MY BOOBS FLOPPED ALL THE WAY OUT OF MY SHIRT AND BOUNCED UP TOWARD MY EYEBALLS...I PUT ON A JACKET AFTER THAT)

School picture and the piano man

2008-12-18T13:27:00.000-08:00

Brandons first school picture. I want to know who this guy was and how in the fuck he got my kid to smile like this.

Seriously after Christmas, once everyone has seen the card and the pictures I'm going to post the outtakes on here because they are funny shit and none of them, not even the good ones look like the kid above. This picture man, whoever he is, IS A GENIUS!

Brandon, like his mom has created his own language. He often comes up with words that he uses normally like they are just...regular old words. He likes to say, "juke." What is a juke? Beats me. He does it whe he is poking you, or tickling you or something. He also loves to say Shawka while making the hang loose sign. Papa taught him that. So, now when he is in trouble I'll say, Brandon why did you do that? He looks at me, thinks for a second and says "shawka" and runs. He has a favorite though. Bawka. Pronounced like Bawk uh. He often says you are a silly bawka. Today he told me I was a silly bawka. Finally I said Brandon what on earth is a Bawka? His reply?

"A bawka is a knucklehead mom and you a bawka."

Thanks kid!

And finally, the piano man!

I believe we have the next Billy Joel on our hands

Possibly pigtails

2008-12-17T10:28:00.000-08:00

For as long as I can remember I have wanted to have these dorky short pigtails. Now I have them...and as I expected they make me feel extra dorky, in a good way!

Also seriously who gave me photobooth. I swear I will stop taking pictures of myself and posting them here!

I'm not supposed to blog about it

2008-12-16T08:34:00.000-08:00

My husband gets all weird when I blog the nice things he does. He says he would rather have me say it to him then the blog. So, I told him thanks which I think means I can blog about it now. Besides it's my blog I can do what I want. Anywho. About a week and a half ago I came in the room and got in bed. I immediately recoiled from the ice cold freezing sheets. Of course this led to me sitting in bed pouting about how I don't have flannel sheets and how poor me my bed is cold. I then suggested to my husband that obviously the simple answer would be for him to just go ahead and warm up my side of the bed for me and then he could go lay on his cold side since it didn't bother him. Y'all the past 4 nights he has done that. I shit you not. I have been staying up a little bit later then him trying to put Codi to bed. Then I go into our room to find Rob laying on my side of the bed snoring. As soon as he hears me he hops on over to his side and I get to slide into some nice warm sheets. It is beautiful I tell you because I love nothing more then WARMTH!

Then, this weekend when fucking Jodi had to go and tell me that Linens N Things was having a going out of business sale I casually mentioned to Rob that I had found some flannel sheets on sale for $29.99 all the way down from almost $70.00. He told me to buy them. Those puppies should be here any day!

Another cute thing he did. Last week I forgot to start the coffee pot the night before. Who am I kidding. I haven't remembered to start that thing in about 3 months. But I have been getting up and doing it fine in the morning. However once last week when he knew I had, had a particularly long night he woke up extra early got it all ready and as he walked out the door he said, "coffee's ready just gotta push the button." Oh yeah you bet I jumped right up and ran over to get some! It was just so extra sweet.

How about how he's been making the cutest effort to open my door every time we go somewhere together. Seriously people it's the sweetest shit I've ever seen. I've never been big on all that chivalry stuff but when he does it I totally melt.

And yesterday, he left a little early so he could go out and wipe all the snow off my windows and get my car all ready for me. Saturday I was going somewhere in his car. With out even knowing it he started it, turned on the heater and had it all ready and warm before I even got in.

Last week I woke up to find a card hiding in my closed laptop from him. It was so sweet saying that he loved me and that he loved my new hair too!

You know, sometimes I may want to totally kick my husbands ass, but most times he really puts a smile on my face!

Finally my favorite thing he's been doing lately. He's been making a huge huge effort not to fart in front of me. Especially not at the dinner table anymore!

But you know, before you all think I got sick and mushy on you I didn't. I just ran out of things to talk about and figured why not talk about him. And it's not like I was telling you the blue sani hut water story, or the army crawl story I was just telling sweet stuff. You want to hear some really romantic stuff? Last night we cuddled up on the couch and watched an infomercial about colons. Yes. I sat next to my husband and watched him get all giddy over a 6 foot long black poop that some miracle pills make you do and how much he REALLY REALLY WANTS A 6 FOOT BLACK POOP OF HIS OWN!

So, yeah. Then there is that!

This is one of the Christmas pictures that didn't make the card. We have an even better pic together that I will show you when our cards come in!

Hi

2008-12-13T15:33:00.000-08:00

We went to take pictures this weekend and Ginger came along to act as photographer. Seconds before we got in the car I had Rob snap a photo of us. Aren't we cute! I love my Ginger!

(Also I totally ruled at the board game Life for the second time in a row...RULED)

me

2008-12-12T14:56:00.001-08:00

My pants are always frayed at the end, possibly because I'm too short. I like them like that, it feels like me, a little frayed at the ends. I can't chew minty gum. I like fruity stuff. Mint brings me down. There is never enough basil on things. I always feel stupid asking for more basil. My shoes are never organized. My side of the room is always a mess. I am a mess. My extended family makes me feel like I'm drowning. My kids are the single most amazing thing I've ever done. I wish I would have attended culinary school. I want to taste everything on the 1001 foods you need to try before you die list. I probably would never taste them because they are scary looking.

I don't fuss with my hair. I don't wear makeup. I'm the most high maintenance plain person you will ever meet. I drink coffee for the taste not the flavor. I love soup. I don't eat soup enough. I could waste a whole paycheck on Itunes. My Ipod is dying and I feel like a little piece of me is too.

There is never enough coffee. Or enough hot water. But always plenty of dishes. And crumbs on the floor. I wish my kids could wear footie jammies always. I can't imagine that some day they will grow up and move out. I wish they called me mommy and not mom. Mom sounds so grown up. I would love to cook like the people on Top Chef. I want to be a judge on Iron Chef. Not on a day they serve fish though, I don't think I would like trout ice cream.

I get excited over little things. Most recently I was thrilled over a new Maxi Pad. My littlest keeps calling the operator. I need to take a shower but my husband is sleeping. We are taking family pictures today. I wonder if we can photoshop out my donut waist. Lets photoshop out my sons lack of haircut too.

I'm tired. Very tired.

Nothing

2008-12-10T23:10:00.000-08:00

It is coming on fast this time. I can feel it. I suppose it is a positive thing that I know when my dark times come. I can give people warning. Although, I imagine if they look hard enough it is easy to see it coming. I told Rob to be on the look out and he is. He's kind of treating me like a fragile package which is smart for him because right now I'm mostly like a time bomb. You never know if I will react by screaming in your face or simply breaking down into tears. Although thinking about it, I'm not sure he really needed me to tell him. I think the other day when I looked over at him for no reason and said, "it would feel so good to punch you in the teeth right now," with a dead serious smile on my face, he knew...in fact that might have been a dead give away huh?

I called my pediatrician yesterday just to verify that I really really can't take anything. I asked about Ativan, Prozac and Zoloft. She said they were all classified as, "not enough testing done, could cause long term negative effects," meaning she absolutely could not advise me to take anything. Her advice was to stop nursing. Which, awesome, yes let me stop eating my child who has a food aversion and refuses to eat anything but boobs.

I am happy though that the people in my life have finally stopped trying to offer me suggestions. I've been dealing with this for at least 15 years and personally I think I do a pretty great job of handling it with out medicine. I've tried everything and, for the most part I know what works. Honestly, when people make suggestions to me it makes me sad, it simply makes me feel as though they think something is wrong with me. I function fine, I go to work, I shower, cook and clean and act human, and yet they feel so bothered by me they have to tell me how I should change. I think it would simply be easier to allow me to work it out the best way I know how and just be there to listen. I guess, I tell you this now, so that if you have someone like me in your life it can serve as a warning, stop trying to tell them how to be different. You may think you are offering helpful advice but honestly to them, you might as well be screaming YOUR DOING IT WRONG PLEASE CHANGE WHO YOU ARE TO SUIT MY NEEDS. Just because you may be uncomfortable around a person like me doesn't mean you need to tell me how to be different, either leave, or learn to deal with it. I'm not harming anyone so why on earth would you waste so much energy telling me I'm not handling my life right? It is a relief to have the people I have in my life. They simply act like a friend, listen and let me work it out myself.

I love when people ask me about it though. When they try and learn how I work instead of just sit back and judge. Katie spent a good 20 minutes on the phone asking me about stuff today. About my insomnia and my photographic memory that never stops. I was telling her about my mind. How the memories never shut off. I spend my day clicking through images. Remember those old school toys with the slide things you put in them, and then you would click through and see different pictures. That is exactly how my head is, only someone else is in charge of the clicking not me.

Viewmaster childs toy = my head

The worst part is, they aren't even always worth while memories. For example, at least once a week I find myself remembering the time my friend Sandy's mom asked her to make toast. So I went with her and watched as she slathered bread with margarine and then shoved it in the toaster. Butter was dripping out all over the counter and I was massively grossed out. This is a pointless memory yet I have to re-live it weekly. This is part of why I never sleep. The sleeping pills never did anything to shut down my mind. Can you imagine trying to sleep while your brain is busy replaying images of the time you went to Taco Bell and ate a taco, no not that time, the other time. Or how about trying to sleep when your mind won't quit playing the time that guy brought you chicken noodle soup because you were sick, but you didn't eat meat, but you didn't want to make him feel bad so you ate the fucking soup anyway just to be nice. Yes. It is hard living in my head. The memories, the slide shows, they never stop and they span back to when I was about 3. Maybe earlier, because the memory that plays the most often of all is when my dog got stolen when I was very very little. Followed by the stupid memory of this sticker my dad had that said Phishlips. On my fucking deathbed I'll still see that goddamn sticker in my head.

I hate the feeling of wait though. I hate knowing it is coming and having to just sit here and wait. It's mostly here but the worst is yet to come. I never really talk about that time. That is when people really start worrying or feeling sorry for me. I know I'm thankful I found the man I did. He's a special kind of person for dealing with this crazy. I'm trying to be more aware this time. More aware with the kids. If I sense myself getting angry or moody I've started letting Rob handle bed time for Brandon or having him hang out with him. It is easier then blowing up over nothing, yelling and then feeling worse then I already do because I'm a terrible mom who yells. It works well and I'm able to make sure every second I spend with my kids is happy and fun and relaxing.

I guess that is why I finally decided to entertain the idea of medicine. While I know I'll still always have these periods, I also know the meds will help enough that I won't have to walk on egg shells around my kids and family. I can't wait to not be the mom who yells. I'm hopeful at the prospect that my kids will always remember a smiling dorky mom who just loved to play and hang out with them. I'm hopeful they will remember only fun story times at night, and games of tag, and cooking in the kitchen and never ever remember me having a full fledged melt down because the toothpaste fell off the toothbrush or because their hair wouldn't comb just right.

Anyway, you are warned, I have no idea how my future posts will be. I'll try to keep it light and fun, but there are no promises. At least now you know.

Finishing up Brandons room

2008-12-10T07:06:00.000-08:00

We made some more progress in Brandons room. His letters are hung on the wall (I still want to paint them but it is too cold outside for me right now)

Rob got his antique fishing rod hung up this weekend
And look!!! Brandon already caught a big one!
WE pulled the hook out of the lure and nailed it in the wall so he thinks he caught a fish.
Brandon thinks he is pretty cool with his very own fish on the wall!

Tree

2008-12-09T21:22:00.000-08:00

I was reading Brittany the other day when she showed us her Christmas tree. Like me she has young kids at her house so she wanted a safe tree. She found a bag of those ball pit balls at the thrift store, poked holes in them, stuck some string in and hung them on the tree. I thought it was genius, only I couldn't afford to go buy balls. So I roamed my house picking up loose baby toys. I started tying strings to them and putting them on the tree.

At first I wasn't sure how it would look, but the more little toys I found the more fun I had. I pulled out some of Brandons wood puzzles and tied strings around the pieces of those and the animals looked so cute on there (You can see a giraffe puzzle piece and an elephant in the above picture). Slowly I started getting more crafty. I tied ribbon around Brandon's favorite cookie cutters, and stuck some of the big soft balls in there.

I even tossed in a Halloween pumpkin. There is also some Spongebob fishing bobbers. I hung up what non breakable decorations I had and called it done. I am totally thrilled with it. This is my favorite tree and best of all it is SAFE! Can you believe not even an hour later a friend emailed me about he daughter having to get stitches in her foot that weekend from stepping on an ornament that had fallen off the tree. Right then I knew I made a good choice.

Thanks so much for the genius idea Brit! I think I'll keep this up for at least 3 more years!

Answering your questions

2008-12-08T20:15:00.000-08:00

An anonymous commenter posted on my no peanut post with a question,

My daughter, who is one of the pickiest eaters is going into preschool in January. This whole time, I have been planning the majority of her lunches to be pb&j since that's one of the few cold lunches she will eat. After reading your blog, now I'm at a total loss of what to feed her. She hates meat, the only meat she will eat is bacon, chicken nuggets and fish sticks. Her school only allows cold lunches... so do you have any suggestions? I hate the idea of her causing another kid harm with pb, but now I don't know what to feed her.... what food to you pack in your son's lunch? TIA for your help!

I thought I would post my reply. Also if there is anything I left out please feel free to leave her more thoughts in the comment section. Please excuse my errors this is from my phone.

misguided mommy said... hey anon. I'm writing from my phone so please excuse the spelling errors. First keep in mind cold lunch doesn't mean the food has to be cold it simply means they won't heat it. I have a great very cute crayola thermos I got at target for brandon. I heat sgetti,macaroni, and soup before school and it is still warm for brandon lunch. Guess what I bey chicken nuggets would also stay warm. Other kid friendly items, gogurt dry cereal, cheese sammiches (brandon also hates meat), fruit like melon or grapes. One kid in brandon class last week had lunchables. I have done spagettios and even dry feral with a cup of milk for the teacherS to add to the bowl ( think g dry cereal in a bowl with a snack lid and then either a small carton of milk or a large enough sippy cup full that they can just poor some out). Poptarts don't have nuts. Cheetos and fruit roll ups are safe too. Mini eggos warmed in the thermos with a snack cup of syrup to dip in. Even oatmeal and cream of wheat. Cora soup or alphabet soup. Anything she can/will eat in a thermos. Quessidillas even. Most chips. Pudding jello and yogurt. Chunks of cheese. Remember it is more important to pack food your kid will eat then worry how it looks. I was terrified the first time I sent brandon with a bread and cheese sandwich, cheetos, watermelon a d chocolate milk. His teacher was more impressed I packed what he would eat. Other ideas to help her eat. I used to cut brandons cheese sammy with cookie cutters. I also let him help pack it and finally I drew cute little things on his napkin. Last. You can always to cream cheese and jelly sandwiches instead of pb annnnnnnnd finally nearly every store even walmart sells soynut butter that is peanut free, she will never know.

Photobooth you scare me

2008-12-07T18:12:00.000-08:00

And it's gone

2008-12-06T16:08:00.001-08:00

My hair has been giving me a headache for a while now. It was so long, beautifully long, but at the same time, it was too long. I don't have time to do my hair anymore. It's not like when I was young and I could spend an hour fucking with it, no, now I spend 43 seconds brushing it and I'm out. My solution lately has been to pull my hair up. This has been causing massive headaches and, honestly it just looked like shit that way and sloppy. Finally, I decided it was time to cut the shit off.

I thought about doing a poll on here but I knew if you guys said don't cut it, I wouldn't because I was always looking for a reason not to. So, I very quietly made an appointment and just did it. I have two ponytail holders full of hair that I will be mailing off to the Pantene Beautiful Lengths program. My hair was long enough, thick enough and it hadn't been died so we made sure to cut off enough to send. I haven't styled it yet, I told her I was going home to shower so not to bother with styling. This is how it looked after simply drying on its own. I go back in five weeks after fucking with it some to get some layers and what not. She wanted to wait to do layers until I had played with it enough to know what I wanted, how I liked parting it and so on.

With out further ado, my new hair.

How it looks after a shower (it flips out or in, this is out)

Also, I'm very tired, and pale and I kinda look like crap today, so you know, try not to comment on the whole you look like a worn out mom thing KTHX!

No planters for us

2008-12-05T20:03:00.000-08:00

Today we went in for the follow up on Brandon's first allergy test. There was good news, bad news and, new news. The good news is they believe his original positive reaction to egg was either a false positive or he has grown out of it because today he had zero reaction. The reason I am so happy about this is that he was able to finally receive a flu shot (he could not before because part of the flu vaccine's binding solution contains egg). He also tested negative for strawberries and shell fish.

I told them of a time when he went to someones house with a large number of cats he came home wheezing and puffing around the eyes. I said I wasn't sure if it was cats, or if it was possible since the house was atrociously dirty he had encountered dried up peanut butter somewhere. They said both were a possibility and tested him. Sure enough, like his dad he has developed an allergy to cats.

I also advised the doctor about a time at a pumpkin patch, when he road donkeys he came home with breathing trouble, hives and swollen lips. Turns out he is allergic to horses, donkeys, goats, and other farm animals with similar hair. Guess I have to take back the pony I bought him for Christmas huh!

Finally they retested him for peanut. She poked him and walked away. He immediately went to itch. I of course had to hold his hands and refuse to let him itch because it could spread it, and alter other test areas. The next thing I know he was crying and screaming and writhing in pain. They made it stay on for 18 minutes. Here is how it looked after only 1 minute.

After they came in, they handed me a tissue and told me to gently wipe his back to relieve him. Instantly the small amount of whatever peanut trace could have been left behind caused the 8 other negative reactions to turn positive. The doctors were baffled by it. They said it was the most severe reaction they had seen. I have tons of restrictions for him now. He told me that grandparents are the number one cause of kids with allergies having reaction, after that was other peoples grandparents, church functions and then daycare. At daycare he said the biggest cause was children who had a peanut type breakfast, aka a granola bar and then coming to school and touching your child. The doctor said that while parents of course know the school is a peanut free zone, they often never consider what their kids ingest before coming to school, and most often they don't wash their hands first.

I recently interviewed a preschool and was appalled when they told me that they allow peanuts. The director said their solution was simply to place a child with a peanut allergy at a separate table. Can you even begin to imagine the danger that poses. Kids get peanut butter in their hair, on their clothes, on their hands, in their nails. In fact, one child bit Brandon today. Can you only imagine if that child had just ingested peanuts and then bit my kid.

I went to the lake recently for a family function where someone was serving sandwiches. There was peanut butter and salami. She said it would be fine if Brandon ate them. She was pretty sure she cut the salami first and then cut the peanut butter. They were on the same plate but different sides so it should probably be okay. I just stared at her stunned she would even suggest it, let alone feed the other three kids there peanut butter, knowing they had been touching Brandon all day.

The handout they gave me stated that 10% of products labeled "processed in a plant with or may contain trace amounts of peanuts" contain peanuts. Then it said 5% of those products contain enough peanut to cause an anaphylactic reaction. That scared the shit out of me. I had to remove probably 85% of the Halloween candy this year because it contained trace amounts or was processed in.

Finally they said that because of his allergies, dads allergies and my moms allergies, Codi has an 80% allergy of developing a sever allergy. The sad thing is they have no way of pinpointing what could cause the allergy. He is banned from all nuts, eggs and fish until after he is three.

Another interesting fact. They told me the large majority of the population is not allergic to strawberries. He said, strawberries contain high amounts of histamine, and when people ingest large quantities they will break out in hives. The doctor said this reaction often leads people to think they are allergic when really it is just a generic response to histamine. Neat fact, since I've actually had that happen to me, and I spent a long time thinking it was a strawberry allergy.

YOU SUCK WILLIAMS SONOMA

2008-12-04T20:25:00.000-08:00

I reallllly try to delete all of their emails. But when this shit came through my inbox the other day I knew I was fucked. First, I want to say Brandons favorite food is shredded cheese. He loves the cheese grater but it is a little big for him. That is why when I saw all of Williams Sonoma stupid kid line I freaked out. A whole line of MINIATURE KID THINGS!!!

Like this kid safe mini grater, yeah I need that.
And we really need a mini personalized chef jacket right?

A puzzle food tray, well of course that is a necessary item

And every chef needs a hat to match his jacket

Of course after seeing his trouble with my large whisk the other night we for sure need a kid size whisk.

Don't even get me started on the aprons, and pink princess tools, and measuring cups and oh my lord the madness. Fucking Williams Sonoma. Some day when I'm a billionaire I will have all of this for myself. I mean, err, for my kids.

All by himself

2008-12-03T18:23:00.000-08:00

These are Brandon's new fishing lures. They were collected from family. His room has a fishing theme.

This is Mr. Fish. He lives on Brandon's wall. This weekend we are hanging a vintage fishing pole with the line hanging down so it looks like Brandon caught a fish.
Brandon made some brownies last night, mixing with the wisk was kind of hard, eating them was not!
Codi fell down two stairs tonight and is now sporting fat lip and a very bloody nose. He finally fell asleep so Brandon ran over, turned on the record player and said, "mom I make music for Codi" It was so sweet.
He did this all by himself tonight. My mom has been teaching him after school and tonight he came home and did it with no help.

I AM VERY SORRY IN ADVANCE

2008-12-02T09:30:00.000-08:00

I hate Christmas music. There are three songs total that I like. One of them is very very very old and imagine my surprise this morning when I was driving down the road listening to the radio and that song came on. Soooo. In honor of Christmas and December you all get to hear my most favorite Christmas song!

DON'T LAUGH

(It is Dolly Parton)

Preschool continued

2008-12-02T06:43:00.000-08:00

You may remember a while back I wrote a post on the problems I was having at Brandons preschool. I promised you an update and here it is. This will probably be long winded, so you have been warned.

After reading your comments, which all leaned toward talking to the director, I thought I would give the teacher the benefit of the doubt and wait it out. Only problem is, I just kept right on waiting. The teacher seemed to get moodier, and ignore me even more. The last straw was when I checked Brandons folder one day to find a bunch of papers stapled together. They were things with the letter "C". I had no idea what they were. Where they homework? Was it work Brandon missed when I took him home early one day? Where they even learning the letter "C"? WTF was going on? I realized two things, 1: A good daycare teacher would have told me what they were studying & 2: A good day care teacher would have explained what was in my kids folder rather then leaving me guessing. The problem came when I realized this ladies attitude was so poor I would have rather not known then actually have had to talk to her. The next morning I was going to fix this.

I asked the lady at the front desk to have the director call me. I received no call. I reminded her the next day, and two more days after. I GOT NOTHING. Finally I had just plain had it. I sat in the waiting room and said I wasn't leaving until someone talked to me. The director was in the baby room chatting with a teacher. The girl at the front desk got up and told her I was there. The director continued chatting and left me out there for almost ten minutes before the front desk lady went back in to remind her. Finally the director walked out and said I could come in. She sat down at her desk, not looking at me and kind of ignored me. So I opened, "Ummm I feel like there is a problem with my sons teacher and I, and I would really like to resolve it." The director mostly ignored me and didn't offer much help and pretended not to know there was a problem. Finally I said, "you know, I was really bothered that he was put in time out for going potty, and I feel like she was upset that I talked to her about it." Her response was, "yeah I heard about that." WHAT?!?!?! You heard about that? I was mad, obviously the director knew there was a problem, a big enough one for the teacher to go to her, why wasn't I told? After much talking in circles it was suggested we have a parent teacher conference. The director told me, "maybe you should cry during it because the teacher has a hard shell and she isn't going to be nice to you most likely, but maybe if you cry, she has a really hard shell but I've seen her soft side, so I know there is one." At that moment I kind of realized the director and teacher were friends.

I asked why no one in the class ever communicated with me. She said they had a curriculum board out side the class. I said, yes but it doesn't tell me what they are doing this week besides that they are learning to receive a gift. No where on the board does it say letters, numbers, that they are doing the days of the week, none of it. I asked about the homework and she said well you should have figured it out if the teacher didn't tell you????

I talked to the director about how much I loved Brandons old class, how wonderful the teachers were how much I missed that. She proceeded to bash the other teachers for not being structured enough. Making it seem like the teachers I liked were actually not the favored teachers and that they had a lot of improvements to make. My mind was reeling.

The last thing I said was, "I've been so upset about this, I even blogged about it looking for answers on how I should handle this."

Her response,

"Yes I heard about the blog."

My jaw dropped. I was so angry. I had just spent this much time in here and she just now tells me this. She told me, that "someone" at the school had told the teacher about it, so the teacher went up to the break room on school hours and searched the Internet until she found my blog. She then printed it and was quote, "very upset looking." Explain to me WHY NO ONE THOUGHT I SHOULD KNOW THIS? I now could not believe that the director would know the teacher was this upset with me and still choose not to tell me, and still choose to leave my child in a class with this woman.

Before I left I looked at her and said, "I just don't see how someone here would have found my blog." The directors reply,

"Well, do you have Myspace?"

I lost it at this point. I was appalled, was this lady really telling me teachers at this school look up parents on Myspace? Wow! I left with an appointment to meet with the teacher the next day.

I went back to work, talked about it with my mom and husband and over the next two hours I just grew angry. I could not believe my son was at a school with teachers who acted like little middle school girls Myspacing each other. I can't believe the director knew this and didn't see a problem with it.

I called a daycare I loved before that had no openings and was informed they had one opening. I drove to Brandons school and told the lady at the front desk I wanted to withdraw my son. She said there is two weeks notice that you need to give, and I said, NO I'm removing him now, we can deal with the two week money thing later. She went and got the owner who invited me in. I was now in the office with the owner and the director. I told the owner my problems and was shocked when I realized she knew nothing about the complaints the teacher had made. She knew nothing about the teachers problems with me, and knew nothing about my problems with her. I expressed the same concerns, never being told Brandon was put in time out, to which she looked at the director and asked why I didn't receive an incident report. The director said they don't do those. I could tell the owner thought that was wrong, because it is WRONG. The director tried to stutter out some bullshit excuse about how they didn't tell me about Brandons previous time outs because, "we don't really like to hit parents with the negative about their kids right when they walk in." I asked her well, if you weren't going to tell me then when were you? They had no answer.

The absolute final straw is when I said, "you know ____ (owner) I don't feel like Brandon's teacher wants to be teaching, I don't feel like she is happy here."

The exact response of the owner was, "I can not completely disagree with you on that."

I just looked at her and asked her, why she would have teachers here who didn't want to be here. She said it was too hard to find replacements. I asked her then why on earth would they ask me to keep my son in a class with someone who didn't even want to be there? The owner replied, "I completely understand that."

I asked her why people there were Myspaceing and researching parents. She looked clueless. The director tried to stumble over her words and say, "well I don't know if that's what happened, it was just a suggestion." I am smart enough to know you only make a suggestion like that when that is what is actually happening.

I let her know I was taking Brandon home. The owner asked me please not to make any decisions until that night, she would call back. I was too mad and I went right over and enrolled Brandon in the new school. She called that night and spoke to my mom and said, "I really don't want her to pull him out, there is something big that is about to happen with that teacher, I can't tell you what, but she should stay." I wanted no part of whatever Big thing was coming.

I went in the next day to return my key fob for the door and to find out about Brandons pictures. I asked the front desk lady to stop my automatic payment deduction. She said, "no problem once I click this little button right here NO MONEY CAN EVER BE TAKEN FROM YOUR ACCOUNT AGAIN." She said she didn't know about pictures or the fundraiser items either. I finally asked her about the money. The day before I had told the director I didn't think I should be totally responsible for the full amount of the two week notice payment, because it was her teachers fault I was leaving. She said she would discuss it with the director and let me know. The lady at the front desk went and asked the director who played stupid and acted like she knew nothing. The owner was conveniently on vacation for the rest of the week. I left my number and asked for a call back. I got nothing. I went back in a few times to inquire about photos and money.

Two weeks had passed and no calls back. I was in there often enough asking about pictures I kind of thought they would have said something to me. Thanksgiving morning I woke up and went to balance my checkbook, when I noticed the school had taken $150.00 from my account. I was pissed, but most pissed because I knew that due to the holiday I couldn't do anything until Monday.

I went in Monday and asked the lady at the front desk if money could be taken. She again assured me, in front of another employee that no funds could be moved because she had deactivated my account. I asked her to put it in writing, which she did. Then I asked why $150.00 was taken from my account. Her and the other employee were both stunned. They both looked shocked, and the other employee totally agreed that was unacceptable. I asked to have the teacher call me back. I needed her to call me before 3pm because if it went any later my checking account would be effected. I told them after I contacted my bank, the bank agreed it was fraud and that I would have to file a police report.

By noon I had no call back. I called the school. The owner got on the phone and was very rude. Claiming she was not giving me back my money because it was hers. I nicely informed her that legally she should have supplied me with a bill for my final charges, since I obviously had no access to the schools computers anymore to see my balance. She snarled at me that they don't do bills and it was her money. I was starting to lose patience. I informed her a few things, 1. I have done A/R for years I happen to know you can't legally take money from someone with out a court order. 2: She had to provide me with a bill or I wouldn't know what to pay. 3: I would now be filing a police report and that my bank had already opened a fraud report. 4: I was also calling the Better Business Bureau and the daycare corporate. She said she would call her attorney and that they don't do bills there and it was her money.

I called corporate and they were appalled. They couldn't believe the things I told them. They couldn't believe that there was more then 15 kids to a class with two teachers. They were so upset at the excessive use of time outs. Corporate informed me that this school is supposed to be a redirection school, not a time out school and that was a last resort. When I told her that they didn't have time for redirecting every kid, because, "they know what they are supposed to do and not do, and if they don't do it, they go to time out" the girl on the phone opened an immediate report. In fact she was so mad she personally pulled up the number for child services and asked me to call and report this daycare. She let me know that since each daycare was owned by someone, not them they couldn't get involved in billing but THAT IT WAS ILLEGAL what they did. She gave me the phone number for a government agency here and told me to report it immediately.

At this point the owner called me back. I told her what corporate said to which she again snarled, "they don't own me they don't have a say in my billing." I replied, that yes corporate had said, that and had told me who to report her too. I told her that I didn't want any of this. I just wanted my sons pictures, my bill and I wanted to leave. She was rude. I said, fine I have no choice but to finish the reports to the BBB, and to finish the police report. She said again I wasn't owed a bill because I "knew" what I owed. I laughed because they amount they took from me wasn't the normal tuition, it was a random amount. To which she replied, "well you had a credit." WELL HOW THE FUCK WOULD I KNOW THAT IF I DIDN'T GET A BILL???? I asked her that and she yelled "we don't do bills." I was stunned. This lady expected me to just magically know what amount I owed even if I couldn't access the schools computers. Finally I asked her why she took the money from me. That was illegal. She said, no you had automatic funds withdraw. I said, yeah that was cancelled by your staff. That your staff admitted was cancelled in front of other employees. It was obviously cancelled because no money was removed from my account for OVER TWO WEEKS! I said, you just told me I owed this money since the 17th, this was 10 full days later the money would have come out sooner, which means you ILLEGALLY went in and used my card. She got all flabbergasted and yelled that she would only give back my money if I signed something saying I would pay her. I said NO I WANT A BILL. I was like look it's no problem, my bank is already processing the fraud case. She said in the end that she will bill me and if I don't pay she will take me to court, and then slammed the phone down on me.

Here are my issues.

1. If you made an appointment with a doctor and missed it, they have no right to go in your file, pull up your credit card that you used once and charge you for the failure to show fee THEY HAVE TO BILL YOU.

2. I work in an office, I deal with credit cards every day and I know legally credit card numbers HAVE TO BE DESTROYED. The fact that they kept it, reactivated it and used it is a huge legal issue.

3. I balance my checkbook to the cent, to remove money from someone like me can cause huge problems.

4. I never received a phone call. The owner claimed to call me. I have an IPhone. All of my voice mails are logged by number visibly, there was none from her. All of my missed calls are still there, there are none from her. The last call from that school I answered and it was the front desk lady telling me when pictures would be in.

That school is fucking bonkers. I have gone ahead with the BBB report. I hope corporate follows through. I think I might still call child services and let them know some of the other stuff I know.

I have since moved Brandon. He is at an amazing school. They don't believe in time out, they do redirection. The teachers are wonderful and amazing. They have a weekly curriculum that is printed for me. The school does a weekly letter and number. They do a daily sign, and a daily Spanish word. They do songs, and interesting fun activities. Each week has a theme. One week was dragons, queens and kings. I was then invited to participate in a show and tell to which we packed dragons and other themed objects. They list the songs they learn so at night when Brandon asks to sing the car song I can look it up and sing along. They teach me the signs and words. I love it. The kids eat in the class so they are not herded in and out of a lunch room in under 20 minutes with out being given ample time to eat. Brandon doesn't come home starving every day like he used to. Last week there was a Thanksgiving party where I was invited to bring a dish and then even join the party. I met other moms and had a wonderful time with his teacher. I love his school. I'm appalled that there are other schools like his old one out there. I'm sad for every little kid who has to attend a school where 5 time outs is normal.

Redirection has worked amazingly. Every day the teacher tells me how wonderful he is doing. The two times in three weeks he did get into a fight with a little boy I was given an incident report. When he got a booboo I was given and accident report. When the teacher noticed a conflict with him and another child she told me how to deal with it, what to say and what angle to take. It has worked amazing and the conflict is mostly gone. I am thankful I moved but I still feel sad for all the other kids.

I will not mention the name of the school here, but if you are in Reno, and you are local you can contact me. I have already let all of my friends here know, and have already encouraged them to get on other lists. I hadn't written about this yet because I now obviously know they read me at the old school. I wanted to let it all drop but I just couldn't after having them illegally remove money from my account. There is obviously a lot I'm leaving out or missing, because I'm running out of time. I wanted to make sure I at least provided you with a day care follow up though, so there it is.

Nevada Nanny

2008-12-01T10:12:00.001-08:00

I don't know who you are, but thank you. I called Nevada Early Intervention and they are going to do an assessment on Codi. If we are approved they will provide nutritionists and occupational therapists, plus a food group for babies where they make eating fun. Thanks a ton for that tip!!

Stories through pictures...Alternate title..MEN AND FRUIT!

2008-12-01T07:13:00.000-08:00

Lisa posted the first leftover turkey recipe on the Tasty blog

This was on Fail Blog this morning, made me laugh my ass off.

My mom got Brandon a great Advent Calender from Starbucks this year. This was him opening his first chocolate this morning

Shoving the candy in his mouth

HAHAHA Huge ass piece of candy. My mom asked why I gave it to him this morning and not after dinner. Well that is easy, HE WOULD HAVE TO EAT DINNER FIRST. I told her, "He should eat it right when he wakes up because then there is no chance of him being in trouble yet, I wait till after dinner, he'd never get to eat it!"

Note to self: When your baby is used tipping his drink out of a sippy cup, you must expect that when you give him a drink with a straw he is going to tip it back and pour said drink all over his face. Again, and again and again.

Driving home from my parents last night we saw this house, Brandon almost had a coronary shouting that it was beautiful and WOOOOOOW and the music and Holy shit you thought he had just found Willy Wonkas Factory.

A few weeks ago while ordering some office supplies I noticed a promotion for free scissors. Normally they do free pens but we needed scissors so I jumped on board. This is what came. I am pretty sure they are circa 1789...I see why they were free now!

I totally forgot to post this picture back on the day I bought my iphone. We were made to stand outside in almost 100 degree weather for minimum of an hour and a half. Apple was handing out waters but they only came by once ever hour or so. Finally we got about 15 people away which meant we were about 30 minutes away. I looked up to see this glorious fan circulating. It was on, and working and blowing glorious cold air ... BEHIND A GODDAMN FUCKING WINDOW! Yeah, this was J Crew's idea of a sick joke that day, some sort of advertising for summer. What a waist of energy and a massive tease to all of us heat stroked suckers outside.

Codi took some spoons and forks from Brandons drawer and walked around this morning making music.

Then he sat down, hid and made a giant poop in his diaper at the exact second I poured out my cereal to eat.

And finally. Every morning that I pack Rob's lunch I lay it out in one spot. His breakfast here, his lunch, the his fruit, snacks, etc. And every damn morning I turn around to see his lunch packed and...this,

His fucking fruit still sitting on the counter. So each time I have to open his lunch box and put the goddamn fruit in there.

I'm on to you dear!!!!!!!!!

What is it with men thinking a chorizo burrito, a large sandwich and chips is all they need for lunch YOU NEED FRUIT!

Tomorrow, heads are gonna roll

2008-11-30T10:25:00.001-08:00

Someone took $150.00 out of my checking account with out my permission. They automatically deducted it from my account. This place deducted it even though they were explicitly told to deactivate any further deductions from my account. The place with the girl who sits at the front desk who said "I just check this box here and no further money will come out." No money came out for two weeks and then the owner of said place illegally checked off the box again and took money from me. Tuesday I will tell you who did it. You will be so shocked and appalled when you hear this story. Tomorrow I will give them 8 hours to put the entire amount back in my account or I will be filing a police report, disputing it on my debit card AND contacting the better business bureau. That is a lot of money to just secretly try and remove from someones account with ZERO notice.

Cookies

2008-11-29T14:09:00.001-08:00

Brandon just came in and asked me to bake cookies. I wasn't feeling like making dough and what not but I wanted to do something. I had a pie crust left over and I remember my mom saying Thursday that she used to sprinkle cinnamon and sugar on hers and bake it. So that is what we did. I melted butter and let Brandon paint it on. Then I let him sprinkle cinnamon and sugar all over it. After that he used cookie cutters and cut out shapes. We used the left overs and rolled it up into a "B". He loved his cookies.

While we were doing that Codi got caught pushing his favorite button on the dishwasher

He thought it was funny that he was caught

So funny that he growled at me, this is his growl face...also I totally needed to fix the settings on my camera, they were set for different lighting. Oops!

Just some pics

2008-11-29T11:37:00.000-08:00

This apple is as big as my head

Brandon asked for bone chicken (turkey)

Me and my husband (the werewolf)

Papa put Codi on top of the fridge and he thought it was the best thing ever

It rained the other night so I told him lets go outside and play

Shhhh brover is sweeping

Dear Marie Callender's Pumpkin Pie in my fridge

2008-11-28T07:51:00.000-08:00

I am sorry I had to eat you (for breakfast)

But.

Not that sorry.

Thanksgiving

2008-11-27T15:23:00.000-08:00

This is Shannon on alcohol. Not sure I've ever drunk posted before. Hey look at that, I still type pretty well, or, at least spell check makes you think I do. I broke a nail and typing is hard when they aren't all the same fucking length. So, whatever my mom asked me to post what I'm thankful for. Here goes nothing.

1. Kaluaha + Vodka + Half and Half = White Russian, yes am very thankful for 3 of those and a glass of wine, and a cordial of baileys.

2. Thankful that all the right family showed up this year and I enjoyed the most peaceful Thanksgiving of my life (minus the whole KIDS WON'T STOP SCREAMING THING)

3. I'm happy my run away niece got to spend the day with us. I miss her.

4. I'm thankful my parents help me pay for this whole fiasco. I'm thankful for the amazing house they have given me to live in too. Because, if you saw it, it's pretty fucking amazing

5. I'm thankful for carbs

6. I'm thankful that my fresh cranberry sauce was pretty fucking awesome this year

7. I'm thankful for the pie in the oven

8. (And the ice cream in the freezer)

9. I am thankful I've finally learned to surround myself with loving amazing people.

10. I'm thankful I'm able to reacognize that you don't need your entire family to be happy, that you only need the family that "gets you" around.

11. I'm thankful that I'm smart enough to realize that sometimes that family comes in unusual places (Ord)

12. I'm thankful my husband did something special and illegal for me (it involves vampires). He knows how to make me smile and he did it all on his own.

13. I'm thankful for the picture of Edward my mom hung in my closet today...now he can watch me get dressed.

14. I'm thankful for that time late at night when you take of your bra and your boobs drop and you think AHHHHHHH THAT FEELS GOOD

15. I'm thankful for watching my sons jump on my dads belly. Every kid deserves a papa like that. I didn't have one, but my kids sure do!

16. I'm thankful I wasn't to drunk to post about the time my husband got Sani Hut water on his face!

17. Finally I'm thankful for all of my loyal readers. For that small $30.00 BlogHer check I get each month. For the people who comment. The people who email me. The people who found me on Twitter and those of you who know me well enough to know when, well enough is enough!

Cooking away over here

2008-11-25T14:51:00.001-08:00

This week I made my favorite red bean quesidillas, some red rice and my husbands favorite breakfast potatoes. Head over to the Tasty Temptations blog to see my recipes. Not to mention, the photo of what happens when you leave the room and ask your husband to watch that the tortillas don't burn.
http://tasteytemptations.blogspot.com/

Proof you shouldnt make sick parents change diapers

2008-11-25T07:29:00.000-08:00

I've got the worst cold right now. One of the joys of having a kid in day care. He brings me a new germy present every week. Anyway I haven't been sleeping good because of the coughing and the not being able to breath thwu my nose thing. Codi usually wakes up around 615-630. On good days he will let me know he is up by giving a big happy fart. Yesterday he did a big huge fart. I was kind of incoherant but I got up, peed and stumbled over to grab him. I reached down and felt his diaper which was soaking wet. I half walk half sleep walked into his room. Seeing the changing table was his cue to start wiggling like a fish out of water. I wrangled him down on the changing table and went to work pulling off the diaper while trying to also remove it fast enough that he didn't grab it with his hands and kick his feet in it. Only, I was too slow and he did both. Damn. So I ripped it out faster and flung it over by the wipes.

It was then that I noticed his morning fart was..more then a fart. My kid was covered in poop. He somehow managed to get his hands in it AND HIS FUCKING FEET. Then I realized that my act of FLINGING the diaper made poop go everywhere and upon looking down I noticed I had somehow stuck my own goddamn hand in the poop. So I did what every good parent does. I stood there for a second trying to wake up while wondering what the fuck exactly had just happened.

Thats when I realized, that since I was sick I couldn't smell the poop as a warning. I was still standing there unawake, totally out of it when I realized OH YEAH POOP EVERYWHERE. It took me forever to get us cleaned up. The flining of the diaper had leaked poop into the back of Codi's footie jammies. This made it hard because I had to hold him up to clean him, and I couldn't put him down to clean the rest of him or I would be putting him down in more poop. I ended up having to lay a wipe over the poop, put him down at hyper speed and then pull his arms out of his jammies so I could toss them aside. The whole process to change one damn diaper took me freaking 10 MINUTES.

This is why I think that if mom is sick you shouldn't make her change a diaper. Or any parenting for that matter since you need all of your senses to parent. Anyway, that is how my day started, with my kid and me both covered in shit!

Eyes

2008-11-24T20:02:00.000-08:00

A long time ago Brandon was tired but wouldn't go to bed. I started tickling his back and he loved it. From then on he would ask Rob or I to tickle his back or tummy. I love doing that, I love when he asks me to tickle his back. We have other night time rituals too. Brandon has bad dreams at night. Some nights they escalate to night terrors even. Lately what I've started doing is trying to talk to him about good things before bed. Happy things. First I tell him a story that always stars a little boy named Brandon. Sometimes we read books, his favorites are, How Do Dinosaurs Say Goodnight and Sleepyhead? And then as I tickle his back while he drifts off I say, "don't forget to dream about Christmas." He replies, "I won't forget." I do this over and over while drowses. Don't forget Christmas, marshmallows, cookies, candy, Halloween, the part, etc. He drifts off mumbling about Santa clause and marshmallows. Most nights it seems he sleeps better.

Tonight however, was my most favorite. Tonight while putting him to bed he said:

"Mom, will you tickle my eyes."

Then I melted. He drifted off to sleep as I gently rubbed his eyebrows and told him a story about reindeer going clack clack clack on the roof.

Also, check out the books I mentioned above. They are great bed time stories. However Jane Yolen also has a great collection of dinosaur books. We love reading How do Dinosaurs Eat Their Dinner. Kohls sells these for $5.00. You should really check them out, here is the collection.

I love the Sleepy head book for so many reasons. The colors and illistrations are so pretty and the words are very...soothing. Brandon loves it and shouts SWEEPY HEAD when he sees it. Anyway Christmas is coming up so I thought I would start sharing a few of my most favorite books with y'all.

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-11-24T08:48:00.000-08:00

***November 22, 2008***

In case you haven't read about it on fansites or movie blogs, here is the news that we have all been waiting for [source: Summit Entertainment (summit-ent.com)]

SUMMIT ENTERTAINMENT ANNOUNCES TWILIGHT SEQUEL - NEW MOON

Los Angeles, CA November 22, 2008 — Summit Entertainment announced today that the studio is officially moving forward with the production of NEW MOON, the second installment of its filmed franchise TWILIGHT, the action-packed, modern day vampire love story. The movie will be based on the second novel in author Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series titled, New Moon. The first movie in the TWILIGHT franchise, the self-titled TWILIGHT, arrived in theaters this weekend to sold-out showings.

Stephenie Meyer stated, "I don't think any other author has had a more positive experience with the makers of her movie adaptation than I have had with Summit Entertainment. I'm thrilled to have the chance to work with them again on NEW MOON."

2008-11-22T16:24:00.001-08:00

Oh yeah..the kiss

2008-11-22T10:05:00.000-08:00

By the way, the first kiss in the movie, yeah thats going to win some awards. Seriously it was the best movie kiss I've ever seen and I would be lying if I said I didn't catch my self leaning forward wishing he was totally about to kiss me.

Yeah, it was that good.

So really how was the movie---no spoilers

2008-11-22T08:02:00.000-08:00

The first thing I can say is, if you hadn't read this book I'm not sure you would love the movie as much as me...well, anyone will love it as soon as they see Edward and his HOTNESS. When I went to the movie I went to it expecting it would be missing things from the book. Hello, that is a big book it would have to be a 4 hour movie to come close to touching it. That is why, when they did miss things, or change them I didn't mind because I was easily able to fill it in, in my head. At the same time there was nothing big missed. All the big good parts where there. It was the smaller conversations, Bella cooking, things like that, that were absent.

When Edward walked onto the screen I shit you not the ENTIRE theater of girls erupted into some unintelligible screams of oos and awws. And dammit, I WAS TOTALLY SCREAMING IN MY HEAD. Everything in the movie was beautiful. The music, the stillness, the motion, the EVERYTHING. Carlisle is hot. James is hot. Emmet is hot. Jacob is hot. Jasper..not so hot but Alice is so cute she makes up for it. I spent most of the entire movie watching Edward love Bella and like my husband and I discussed last night every single boyfriend/husband/lover was totally fucked last night when their girl got home and A: they were not a super swoony vampire and B: They could never ever ever love their girl with the intensity of A VAMPIRE DUH!

The movie was good. I went with someone who hadn't read the book and he really liked it. They stayed very true to everyone in the book.

I came home and checked out Stephanie's website and she said that she will not be finishing Midnight sun. I was pretty sad. Seems she is to angry that it was leaked early. So, I went ahead and read the half that was out, Edwards side, and IT IS BEAUTIFUL. So, I would read it, it is short, it only covers half of book one...but..it makes you love Edward about 3985098098 times more.

Okay. I have to stop typing I need to go collect change and possibly pawn my wedding ring so I can go see this movie again every day for the rest of my life.

Too busy swooning to type

2008-11-21T20:07:00.001-08:00

Just saw Twilight. Swoon. Sigh. Uggg.

Oh..

To be loved like that...

Swoon!

Old habits die hard

2008-11-21T06:09:00.000-08:00

Today is national BEST DAY EVER DAY because Twilight comes out and thanks to my parents I HAVE TICKETS TO GO TO THE MOVIES WITH OUT KIDS OMFG!

Anyway yeah, I'm a bit excited to see my vampire boyfriend on TV which is why I'm so annoyed that I am sick. I was blowing my nose this morning when I was reminded of one of my worst habits.

I can NOT blow my nose with out then opening the tissue to look inside. I CAN'T DO IT! I have tried to stop but some how that tissue always opens and I always see inside. Which is why I know that today I have green boogers.

YUM!

More budget friendly meal idea

2008-11-21T05:34:00.000-08:00

My cousin and I were talking about our shopping list this week. We compiled a few meal ideas that are very budget friendly. Here they are.

When making spaghetti double or triple the amount of sauce you make. Then you can re-purpose it for lasagna or baked ziti. Next week on Monday I plan to make lasagna then on Thursday I will be making spaghetti. Aside from boiling noodles I don't have to do a damn thing!

I like to do a lot in the crock pot. One of my favorite things to do is cook chicken with onions and garlic. One night I fry a portion of it up with some coriander and adobo and make tacos. The next night I add some green enchilada sauce and make quesidillas. Lisa stretches hers even farther and makes enchiladas.

I also love to make Lisa's Spanish chicken recipe in the crock pot. One night I make taco salads and the next night enchiladas.

My husband loves pork carnitas. When making those I double up since it is only onions, garlic and pork, and some water in the crock pot. The next night you add BBQ sauce and wala pulled pork sammies.

When you make large cuts of steak like tri tip reuse some for tri tip salads, fajitas or sandwiches.

My husband loves frozen chicken wings. They can be grilled, fried or baked. For only ten bucks a bag you get a ton of chicken. I like to use them for what I call weekend meals. I don't like to cook much on weekends and I don't like meals with leftovers. Having those wings around is a cheap way to know my hubs will make food. Normaly on Saturday if I don't want to cook I say fuck it lets get fast food. But now I'm going to make sure I have plenty of wings on hand for him to play with. He can grill em, toss em in hot sauce and butter, fry em or do whatever and it doesn't cost me any thing but the initial cost. One bag lasts at least a month.

I make other cheapy weekend meals like burgers. They are great, no left overs and cheap. You can do so much with a burger too so you can make it more then once in a month. Mushroom burgers, chili burgers, Mexican burgers you name it.

One of the tips I was given in a comment was actually pretty brilliant. If you need a lot of something buy two smaller ones. For example we use a lot of cheddar cheese. I used to be able to afford two big bricks a week. Now I can only buy cheese every two weeks. Well halfway through the week my cheese starts to get a little stale. Zip lock bags actually kind of suck in the way of cheese. This week I'm going to buy two smaller cheeses. That way I have a fresh one each week, I'm not throwing away the stale, discolored cheese and the price is close to the same. I took her advice with the sour cream and it worked great. I don't know about you but I have big issues with sour cream after it is open more then a week. This time I bought two smaller sour creams. Which is good because I've only used one, and the other one is still fresh and sealed up for next week.

Eggs are another great saver. You can do so much with eggs. Especially at the end of the week. Omelets for dinner, scrambles, or frittatas. At the end of the week, or on a Saturday my husband loves to go through the fridge and see what is left and make a big scramble (truth he tries to make omelets but it turns into scramble when he flips it..shhhh I didn't tell you). I've been known to do this too. Have a few mushrooms, some frozen spinach left over, maybe a little onion, and some bell peppers. A couple small pieces of two kinds of cheese and I'm set for a delicious breakfast, lunch or dinner. I always ALWAYS have hard boiled eggs in my fridge. Cheapest meal ever, egg salad sandwich on cheap white bread. Or they are a great cheap item to toss in the hubbies lunch box as a snack. He even has his own tiny salt shaker in there. Two eggs cost you maybe .25 in comparison to how much he would spend at a gas station on a snack, even a bag of chips now is over a dollar.

Other money savers are making more then just dinner. I TRY to make my husbands breakfast most days. Some days I fail but the days I succeed I save at least $4.00 of him going somewhere else. And if I make his lunch even 3 days a week, well that is $12.00 and if I tell the truth that his breakfast burritos cost him $5.00, well shit, that right there is a $15.00 a week savings. Imagine what I could buy for $15.00. His lunch cost a minimum of about $7.00 eating out. If I make 3 lunches I've now saved $21.00 and if I make both breakfast and lunch that is $36.00. I don't know about you but $36.00 is sure a lot of grocery money especially when I can buy a weeks worth of breakfast for just about the cost of one of his fast food meals. Eggs are cheap, bacon is fairly cheap when you consider a weeks worth of use. I like to make him breakfast burritos wrapped up in foil so he can eat them driving. Eggs, tortillas, some sausage and bacon, with a little cheese. Quick, simple, cheap and a nice hot and filling breakfast. Some days I make him breakfast sandwiches, Wonder bread, eggs, deli ham and mayo. Again, cheap!

I realize that waking up in time to make breakfasts and lunch sucks, BUT having that extra money in you're account doesn't suck! I also know first hand that making a double portion of dinner to serve as lunch is not any harder, it doesn't take any longer and you won't even notice. The same goes for double portions to reuse in another dinner. Instead of harder this will make your life easier. Not to mention I personally think spaghetti taste better the next day as my lunch!

Well...shit

2008-11-19T20:26:00.000-08:00

Codi went to his one year doctor appointment today. Everything was terrific. He's walking, says his three words, does every single thing on the chart that a 12 month old should do, he even does stuff a 15 month old should do.

That is, except...

EAT!

After talking to the doctor he thinks Codi has a food aversion. He has given me the names of a few speech therapists. I guess some speech therapists work with children who won't eat. He said we will try textures, flavors, colors, methods of feeding and such plus techniques to desensitize him. I've started reading about it and it seems normal, well not normal but not WEIRD. So tomorrow I will call and we will get started. Has anyone else every experienced this? Were you told to see a speech therapist? Did it work?

They also pricked his finger and he looks a little anemic. The doctor said that was kind of a big NO SHITTER since DUH the kid won't eat. He is growing well, his head is nice and fat and he looked healthy and happy so the doctor wasn't overly worried. He said to start him on a vitamin, offer him every single food under the moon and work with the therapist.

Any advice is greatly appreciated!

Thank goodness for friends

2008-11-19T12:01:00.000-08:00

Last week I went to my mail box and found the prettiest black and white polka dot box ever. Miss Mathers had sent me a care package. While I plan to do an entire post talking about every single item she sent me this post is about one item in particular. As you may have read I was in a bit of a funk last night. The kids wouldn't stop and my nerves were just on edge. I twittered about my need for chocolate. There was none in the house. I found myself in the kitchen staring at one of the things Mathers sent me.

Sweet Cinnamon Spice.

I made some toast sprinkled this on and then died. It was so delicious. So good in fact I don't have a picture of it because I shoveled in my mouth at lightening speed in order to avoid SHARING!

Yes. That is right, I'm a total asshole for the first time ever I didn't want to share with my kids.

Anyway there is a secret ingredient in this stuff that I know but won't tell that makes it so good. In fact I think Miss Mathers should change the name to "Magic Fairey Sweet Pixey Dust Deliciousness."

I suddenly thought OMG I could put this on popcorn or ice cream or in my coffee (which I plan to do tomorrow morning). And while I absolutly won't share my little stash with you I will give you the link so you can go order your own. But. If you do, order enough so you feel safe sharing. Otherwise, you better have a real good hiding spot.'
Order here...beware it's good shit!

SICK SICK JOKE

2008-11-18T18:35:00.000-08:00

I used to tell my husband that God must really love me giving me two boys. After all I wanted boys. They are easier. Cheaper to shop for and mostly drama free.

However I've spent the last hour watching my two children ages THREE and ONE kicking, hitting and choke holding each other. Codi smacks Brandon in the face, Brandon retaliates by locking his legs over Codi's body so he can't move. They both respond by screaming. Codi jumps on Brandon and kicks him in the head so Brandon shoves him off the couch. The next thing I know Brandon is next to me saying MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY CODI PUSH ME MOMMY CODI PUSH ME MOMMY CODI PUSH ME and I have Codi on the other side tugging on my pants saying AHHHHHHHHHWAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJ

Suddenly it occurred to me that God was playing a sick sick joke on me. Only me. Not Rob. Because in a few years these two will be Robs little buddies and then it will be THREE boys picking on me not two.

My husband is sitting over there on lifting his ass off the chair to make sure his fart is as loud and obnoxious as possible. Brandon is sitting here saying UUUHHHHHHHHH which is his version of a burp. Codi is sitting here poking me in the head laughing. All the while I'm sitting here with my head in my hands wishing for 14 fucking seconds of peace and quiet!

Oh and look there goes Codi with my very expensive iPhone in his mouth. Nope, never mind he just dropped it on the tile in favor of climbing my 11 stairs only to get to the top and SCREAM because he can't get down.

Brandon just stomped off to his room only to get up there and start yelling MOM I CAN'T TURN ON THE LIGHT I WANT KID MOVIE MY TV WONT TURN ON CODI IS TOUCHING MY SOCKS STOP IT CODI MOM CODI WONT GO OUT OF MY ROOM MOM.............

And right now I'm thinking fuck getting drunk can I please just have a jumbo bar of chocolate to dunk in a pot of melted chocolate and sprinkle with shaved chocolate.

At this moment I'm thinking fuck this parenting shit is hard. Because some days IT IS. Moms can't be sick, they can't just go hide in another room, they can't go to bed early. Shit, neither can dads. My husband has to be on call 24/7 with Brandon when he wakes up with his night terrors. I can't do it because I have a 2 foot tall tick stuck to my boobs all night.

Codi stop touching my computer mommy is typing. No no don't push that it turns off the comput..................zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Happy first birthday Codi

2008-11-18T11:16:00.001-08:00

Now that is how you eat cake
Originally uploaded by wilddreemer

To see the rest of his pictures click over to my flickr
http://www.flickr.com/photos/wilddreemer/

He had the best day!

Two sickies in a bed

2008-11-17T21:27:00.001-08:00

I spent my day at work with two sickies in my office.

Don't let the smiles fool you they were only nice to each other for about 14 seconds. They spent the rest of the day kicking each other, screaming, shoving and wacking one another in the head with metal objects. Apparantly being sick does not make them be nicer to each other. Sicky one has had a bath and is upstairs in bed with dad snoring (dad is snoring too I can hear him ALL THE WAY DOWNSTAIRS)

Sicky two is passed out in the Boppy in my lap. He had half a bath (you know when you throw half your body in your brothers bath in an attempt to get in)

I'm pretty sure I'll be sicky #3 tomorrow. I feel like shit, my throat is scratchy and I'm exhausted. Note to husband..DON'T KISS ME AT ALL TOMORROW!

Food

2008-11-17T08:41:00.000-08:00

I have a meatloaf recipe and a roasted onion potato recipe up on the food blog. Tonight I have another version of the roasted potatoes and a redoux of the cheesy chicken pasta. I've also started a new catagory over there for cooking with kids. I post up pics of my kids helping me cook. I think I will start putting notes at the bottom of the recipe telling what I let the kids do. For example when we made the meatloaf I put the crackers in a bag and let Brandon smash them. Then I mixed all the seasoning in a small bowl and gave him a tablespoon and let him scoop it in the big bowl as if he was measuring. I also let him crack the eggs in a small bowl first and then let him pour. The other night we made baked apples and I again mixed the seasoning and then let him scoop it in the apples. Then I let him put the precut butter in the apples and pour premeasured juice in there. When I work with cheese I have a small childrens butter knife that I give him. I cut some thin slices of cheese and put them on a plate and then let him cube them and eat them. That way he feels like he is cutting and chopping with me.

Anyway I will try and be better about getting pictures of him helping. I have added other labels too. Such as cheap (which I think I might re-title as budget cooking), and quick cooks. I'm really trying to keep the food blog a nice mix of budget friendly items and then impressive wow your man items.

Anyway check out the latest recipes on the Tasty Temptations blog.

Dear kids, your mom is an idiot..don't be like her

2008-11-17T08:17:00.000-08:00

We had Codi's 1st birthday this weekend at Chuck E Cheese. I know lame huh? But, every kid coming was so much older then Codi it made sense to have the party somewhere that would entertain them, and also somewhere that I DIDN'T HAVE TO CLEAN UP AFTER!

The party was mass hysteria. Seriously that place is like a hornets nest. Only imagine hornets who scream and yell and push and shove and steal other kids tickets and break games and spill juice on themselves and get stuck on the slide and OMFG GET ME OUT OF HERE. Our two tables were actually very pleasant. Codi loved his cake the food was devoured and I think there was only one or two crying incidents from my table the entire time. And one of them was totally MINE!

You see. There was this game there. Ginger played it once and got a ton of tickets so I figured sure why not. The premise is there is a ball attached to a rod. The ball spins around in a circle clockwise. What happens is, you put in your token and the machine gives you a number like 4. Then you have a mallet thing and you get to smash this button in attempt to make the ball spin around the number of times shown or more. Only it doesn't give you a number like 4 it gives you numbers like THIRTY FUCKING TWO! Right. So Ginger says it's sooo easy and she did it the first time and played for like four hours on one token. SO. I whack it. the ball goes around 7 times. I get a little mad and put another token in. Ginger says it's easier if you put your other hand on the mallet when you whack it. So I try. I make it around 18 times toward my new goal of 31. Cram another token in. 17 spins. Now I'm just getting mad. I never got a number lower then 31 to try and beat. Now I'm seeing red. I finally decided it is because the mallet is attached to a string no more then a foot long. You can't even lift the mallet to get good leverage (well you could if you were three feet tall).

I stare at this stupid machine and figure I'll just hit it harder. I smash another token into the fucking machine and mash it with the mallet. FOUR. FOUR FUCKING TIMES AROUND. My cousin Lisa walks up and starts laughing at me. "Four times Shannon is that all." That is why they don't make the mallet string longer because if they did I would have mashed her on the fucking head while she teased me.

THAT WAS IT!

I crammed a final token in the machine and before I knew it I was seeing red and BAMMMMMM!!!!!!!!! I mashed that bitch button with my fist.

OWWWWWWWW!

Fuck me. Now Ginger and Lisa are both laughing at me, shaking their heads obviously thinking this is something only Shannon would do at a kids place. So this morning when I was trying to cut some stuff for dinner, and last night when I was typing that is why my fucking hand hurts.

So. Some advice. Next time you are at Chuck E Cheese, maybe try stepping away from the stupid fucking game before you mash it and nearly break your hand. Perhaps go try something less dangerous like playing in the ball pit.

And NO! I didn't win. Even when I mashed that fucker with all my might bare fisted I still only made it around 9 times. Stupid fucking Shannon proof games.

What would you take

2008-11-17T08:16:00.000-08:00

You are about the be stranded on a desert island. You can bring 3 things but!

You will be provided with all of the basic food and drink items.
You can not bring anything electric or battery operated.
You can not bring a person.

What three items do you bring?

Back from the dark side

2008-11-17T06:47:00.000-08:00

I finished book four yesterday. I think I read all four in about 5 days. I must say the Twilight series might be the best set of books I've read in a really long time. I loved how it made me feel emotions. I was sad, mad, happy, hysterically crying, and furious at least once in every book. Every character made me mad and every character had some redeeming quality that made it so I loved them a thousand times more then I hated them. I dreamt about the book and thought about the characters and sympathized and empathized and just plain fell in love.

Yes. I feel like a dork. Yes. I told my husband I had a crush on a vampire and YES I really really do have a crush on a fictional vampire.

I love how this book was never written to be about traditional vampires. It wasn't all blood sucking and coming out at night. The book was never based on common myths and while of course the whole thing is fake the book is written in a way to make you believe it is TOTALLY FACT!

I would be lying if I said, the same way Sundry is consumed with zombies, I'm now convinced my husband is a secret ware wolf and both of my kids are half breeds, which is because of course I'm a secret vampire. Why else would I be so cold all the time, and why else would my husband radiate heat through me so well and why else would Codi have so much fun biting my boob when he nursed?

Not much else has been going on. This last few weeks I've been having the WORST round of vertigo. I go to bed spinning like some drunk idiot and wake up swaying and rocking so bad I nearly dropped Codi walking from my bed to the door the other day. I've been nauseous and just plain feeling shitty. You know that feeling girls that you sometimes get once a month where you feel like an empty cavern. Like even though you're not hungry you feel like you are starving. Like nothing can fill that void. That is how I've felt. I tried going back on iron to see if it helped. I messed with my vitamins, I ate a little different and nothing helped. I remember last time this happened I spent hundreds of dollars to hear the doctor tell me that with vertigo you have to wait it out. I know there is a pill I can take when vertigo gets too bad but of course since I'm nursing I can't take it.

Codi had his first birthday this weekend. As soon as I get the pictures off Katies camera (my battery died right when we walked in) I'll show you how my son showed his cake who was boss. He has his 1 year appointment this week and I'm sad because I know he won't make the weight requirement to turn around, hes one freaking pound short. I've gotten him to eat saltines and pancakes right now and that is it. Even now I put some cinnamon sugar toast in front of him and he looked at me like I just tried to feed him fois grois. Just to be clear if that was chocolate toast he would totally be eating it.

This just in, Brandon just sneezed a booger so long it DANGLED into his cereal bowl. Eww. Good thing he was almost done.

My parents let Brandon have their copy of Toys R Us Biggest Toy Book Ever. He now spends every night "reading" this book and telling me every single thing he NEEDS! He also points to everything and tells me what is a girl toy and what is a boy toy. Did you know a Hot Pink monopoly set is for boys only?

Brandon just whacked Codi in the head with some big piece of rubber thing while yelling JUKE! WTF is a Juke hmm? I have no clue. Earlier last week Brandon looked at me and told me I was a dork. Gee thanks kid. This weekend at the store with my husband we ran into some of his old work friends. Brandon looked at them and said, "you don't say shit." Hey thanks for that kid!

Oh yeah. We switched his daycare. And I plan to write a ton more about that on Wednesday. It is an excellent story! Seriously, watch for that one!

I feel like I spent the whole weekend doing the same things. I woke up and swept the floors and went to bed and swept the floors. I've cleaned my tables and counters like 6 times this weekend. I'm sitting here right now staring at the food on the floor wondering why kids have to spill so much. It is like they have some kind of built in mechanism forcing them to drop everything in an effort to irritate their parents. I think it is attached to the same mechanism that makes them wake up the second you fall asleep.

Oh did I tell you about this weekend when the giant motherfucker spider came running across my couch this weekend? The spider I tried to kill but instead watched in horror as he ran down the couch and hid UNDER IT. Yeah I didn't sit on that couch for two days because I was convinced spiders were going to come out and kill me. Yes, this was just a day after I was woken up by eight tiny legs crawling on my arm. You know eight tiny legs that fucking disappeared when I woke up and went to mush them! Fucking spiders.

Okay have to go and sweep the floor and try and convince Codi to stop climbing to the top of the stairs and then crying because he can't get down.

As promised...money saving tips from others

2008-11-14T20:52:00.000-08:00

Yeah I know I promised you some of the great money saving tips I got. But then I started reading Twilight. I finished it in 24 hours and went on to the next book, New Moon, 15 hours later I found myself sucked into part three. So that's where I've been. I only have about 100 pages left of Eclipse before I can start book four and then I need find book five online so I can read it before it comes out. My husband is laughing at my crush on a fictional vampire. He's also shocked it's a vampire and not, a cowboy or something. Sigh. Am I the only one who finds Edward so dreamy?

Jiff said

I have done a couple things to make it better for myself: store gift cards. I load money on it and leave the debit card with hubby at home. I have been known to cook a few meals in bulk and store them in the fridge or freezer and just heat them up later. The most common is my friend Courtney's chicken spaghetti.

A recipe that's simple and easy... not gourmet or fancy like what you and Cristina do, but:
cut up and coat ckn breasts in flour. Brown and then add the shells only from Kraft Shells & Cheese with two cans of Rotel. Don't use water, the Rotel is what you use instead. When the pasta is cooked and tender, add in the cheese sauce and it's done. A little spicy for me, so sometimes I use one can of Rotel and one can of water. But whatever. Z and Joe love it.

Christina said
Some of my tips might be a bit more expensive the first time but it adds up over time.
I buy meat in bulk and then seperate it when we get home ( I do one big shop a month and then bi weekly for fruits veggies milk things like that)
That means I have two envelopes(jars here) for food one for the big shop and then the one that is for the bi weekly shop.
I find buying in bulk evens out over the months because I seem to run out of the bulk stuff at different times.
On my big shop I buy ALL the diapers and wipes(gave up cloth for disposable due to the bedrest with the twins) I buy the months supply of cleaning products if I have run out, I buy a huge bag of rice every 4 months (like the mamoth ones). I found with things like sour cream as I don't use it daily and to prevent it from going bad I buy the no name smallest containers then the fresh ones stay sealed in the fridge and it can usually last us through the month. It is hareder for perishable in bulk as I tired the huge block of chesse but it took two months to go through. If I find something fresh I can cut up and freeze I do, my kids don't get the individual snack pack things in there lunch as it costs to much niether do they get juice it is water all the way here. For lunch snacks I bake and freeze things individual pop them into the lunch and they defrost by lunch or snack time. All the older kids (my blog list 3 of my 5 (not including the twins) as I took custody of my step kids prior to my spilt with hubby and am still in the process of them becoming officaly mine yes that will mean 7 with the twins...where was I the bigger kids all have theromoses as it is so easy to make more of a meal ad reheat it the next morning and pop it into the thermoses (which I preheat by pouring in hot water then dumping out). I will compile a bunch of my easy cheaper recipies for you in the ext cuple of days most are convetable with vegetarian meals.

I forgot the sick cupboard have the cupboard pre stocked for colds flus stuff like pop jellp juice crackers whatever you use when someone gets sick then you wont spend as much as if you ran out and grabed anything you could think of.

Mrs J said

We are on a tight budget right now and we try to be as frugal as possible. I haven't done as much menu planning as I should but we really reduced our grocery bills. We use couponing, setting a budget of $30/wk, comparing prices and buying only the best deals, no eating out and learning to say NO to ourselves everytime we're in the grocery store bombarded with so many temptations! Our pantry hasn't been so full since we did this compared to our $200 grocery trips before and we have MORE food now!

Anonymous said

My husband and I just recently ended up in that same position where we're finally being forced to cut back on the excessive grocery spending, and focus on not wasting food... what a bummer! But in the Cooking Light magazine, they just featured a whole series about "cooking once and eating twice." I love this! I just made spaghetti the other night, and then re-used the left-over sauce for lasagna. Or making a tri-tip one night, then re-using the leftovers on top of a salad the next night. It's worked really well for us, and I've definitely seen some savings already since we're not throwing all that extra food away! Good luck... can't wait to hear all the other ideas!